December 30, 2005
I had made another movie!
This is not a movie with great acting like I usually does. This is a movie that shows you how to make food good.
Now David is usually a pretty good cook but sometimes he just doesn't gets it right. Here I shows you how to make it real good.
See I is teaching you something and you doesn't has to pay me!
To see this movie you has to right click on it and then download it it. It is very small but it is very great. If you has a very good computer you can just clicks on the movie and it will play! You will want to watch it over and over again!
You see that big blue dog?
That was a Christmas present from my brother Jimmy! It smells like him. I beats it up all the time!
Jimmy wrote to tell me he is now bigger than me!
December 27, 2005
I is a comic book!
December 25, 2005
I has had a Merry Christmas!
I has had a wonderful Christmas! I got a pig! O got a blue dog for beating up! I got so many treats and cookies I don't know how I'm going to get them eaten up before I goes to sleep tonight but don't you worry I will!
I got toys! I got so much stuff I could have had trouble figuring it all out.
And then I had to go to work. We went to the hospital and I had to doctor a bunch of children. I wore a Santa hat! I passed out presents!
I was thinking, "Shelby, you is a doctor dog. You has to make these children feel better." So I made them chase me to get they presents! It was very good medicine. I could tell all my patients was feeling much gooder.
And then we had food! It were very very delicious food. I had cake! And chicken and beef and ham! These are very good foods for a dog.
I had to say goodbye to all my children patients and go see my other patients. They is all older. Some of them has broke bones and some of them I don't know what's wrong with them but I still know the best medicine is for them to pet me.
Some of them give me food too!
It was a very good day for medicining people. I was a very good doctor this Christmas because all my patients feels better!
With everything I got for Christmas and I got a lot - Thank you Jimmy, Robin and Ben! They was two present David and Santa did not gets me.
I need one of them doctor things you wears around your neck. See you listens to people's bodies with it and go hmmmmm. Like it makes sense to you.
And I wanted SNOW AND ICE CREAM IN MY BACKYARD! Jimmy gots snow and, look Robin gots snow, but poor good dog Shelby who works so hard has not got no snow. I got rain and rain is not delicious. I admit that mud is a lot of fun to play in but some delicious snow would be so much gooder for me. I is a doctor I knows what I is talking about!
But I hope all your Christmases were as good as mine! My Christmas was so great I still can't believe it. I got a pig! Did I tells you that already. I is very tired cause I had to work very hard today and I still has so many treats and cookies to eat tonight!
I think we should have Christmas every day!
December 24, 2005
I am so excited
I has to go to sleep real fast so I can wake up for Christmas.
We went for a walk to get Christmas tamales but they were sold out! I told David if we wanted something special we had to go really really early but it is okay cause I got a big bowl of meat for Christmas! It was very good.
Then we went and looked at Christmas stuff. It was interesting.
It would have been more interesting when it is lit up but this was daytime and they don't put on the lights in the day. I don't know why.
A big dog came out and said hello to us. David made us take him home. David said it was a Christmas good deed. I like doing good deeds cause then I get treats!
When we got home Good Ol' Dog and me got ONE Christmas present! I got a gingerbread cat. I bit it's head off and laughed!
Good Ol' Dog got a sqweeky cookie that I took from her and teased her with!
Santa Tracker is where you can see where Santa is so you can go asleep just before he gets there and then wakes up just after he leaves!
December 23, 2005
I has finally figured out Christmas
I has to a lot of thinking to figure this out but, of course I has figured it all out.
It is a reason to give me lots of toys!
This is a very good thing. It is! It makes me happy! And making me happy is very good cause when I is happy then I is a very good dog, sometimes I is anyway.
Some of you are probably saying "Oh, Shelby! Christmas isn't a time to give JUST YOU presents!"
Then just look at this.
Have you ever seen so much stuff?!?
There can't be anymore toys and cookies left in the world!
I had a hard time figuring out the trees. They has lights and things. Then cause I is so smart I has figured it out. They is there to protect all the toys!
I bet they is a monster in there who will come down and bites you if you try to steal them! David says no, that it am pretty lights like stars in the sky and they is all colors. I DON'T KNOW WHAT COLORS IS!
I also can't have any cookies or toys until Christmas. I don't think David is being mean so there must be something important going on here I hasn't figured out yet.
Two things made me feel kind of sad. First even though I is a hard working dog I has no money! I can'ts send Jimmy and Ben and Robin and Gramma and Ballou presents back! That makes a good dog feel a little sad.
Then I is sad cause even though I am the greatest dog in the world and no one deserves all these presents more than me I gets to thinking about them dogs around here that gots no stupid David to pet them and feed them. Some of them got no home!
I consulted with my colleague, Doctor Karen about this. That am Doctor talk for "I asked her a question."
She says I could give EXTRA toys and things to a Dog Shelter right near where I lives.
Now I will have to wait until Christmas to see if I really has anything EXTRA but if I do I am going to give it to the dogs who am even poorer than me!
Doctor Karen also says I weighs 45.3 pounds and that I carries it beautifully! SHE SAYS MY BUTT IS PERFECT SIZE! And my health is perfect. I knew this cause I am perfect!
Doctor Karen is going to have a baby. She is not naming her baby Shelby even though that is the greatest name in the world.
December 14, 2005
Today I am a REAL doctor dog
Now everybody REALLY has to do what I says! Cause I am a doctor.
I didn't see no patients today but I got some papers that David wouldn't let me eat.
I will see my first patients on Wednesday December 21st. I go in at 3:30 and I figure I will have them all cured by 4.
It was a lot of fun. i saw my classmates and you know what? They has all shrunk!
Before they was all bigger than me now none of them were bigger than me at all!
David was pretty okay. He only embarrassed me a couple of times. I had to tell him once that this meeting is for me and he is just my guest. He's not a doctor you know.
I also get to go to a Christmas party! I don't know what Christmas is but I sure know what parties are - FOOD! Lots and lots of food! So they are a very good thing.
I sent david a Christmas card! I don't remember sending it to him but he got it and my name and picture were on the bottom of it. I is so great I does great things and can't even remembers them!
One thing that is not great is litter. I has told you people to stop it! But almost everywheres I walk I has to pick some up and carries it away.
This had better stop or I will get very very angry.
I know you has never seen a very very angry dog before cause if you had you wouldn't be able to read this! I get's very firce when I am mad and nothing makes me madder than LITTER. I has to walks here people!
If you has to throw stuff on the road meat and treats is a very good idea.
You doesn't have to throw ice cream. All my borthers and sisters has YARDS full of ice cream snow. But do you think they sends me any? NO THEY DON'T! But I is not angry. I has gotten all my mom's brains and all my dad's good looks so I guess it is only fair they have a little extra ice cream BUT ONLY A LITTLE!
I has to go take a nap and invents new ways to cure sick people.
December 10, 2005
You peoples keeps complaining!
You is always writing me letters saying, "Where is you Shelby?" I is right here!
You says, "Why hasn't you written?" Because I been busy!
I is a very busy dog!
When you is sleeping you just sleeps but when I is sleeping I is inventing stuff! Great stuff! Sometimes I sleeps so hard and invents so many great things in my sleep I has to go take a nap as soon as I wakes up!
And of course I has to work and plays and fights. Those are very important things. And I has to work on my doctoring.
On Wednesday I has to see more patients.
Of course I will cures them all very fast so that everybody will say that Shelby am a miracle worker! She am the greatest dog doctor in the world. And I will looks at them and say, "Of course I is! I is Shelby!"
My secret is that I bites very hard and when germs sees a hard biting dog they gets scared and runs away.
That is very good medicine.
What I has been the most busy doing is trying to teach David not to be so stupid!
I has to check up on him every five minutes or who knows what kind of stupid trouble he gets into.
He makes me crazy!
You won't believe this but he doesn't know the different smells between me and the dog next door! It is true! He doesn't!
He can't even tell when the rain is coming by smelling a cloud! He can't! Have you ever heard of anyone so stupid in your life!
I don't know how he got along before I decided to takes care of him.
I asked him to hold this chew toy for me so I can gets a real good bite on it and he holds it stupid!
He can gets all kinds of food out of the food box but he hardly ever takes out ice cream! That shows you just how stupid he am.
I don't know what I am going to do with him.
So when I isn't writing to you it is all David's fault so you should writes to him and tell him to stop being so stupid!
Here am a joke:
Two mens catches a magic bird and the bird say, "Let me go and I gives you each a wish!"
This is a good deal for the mens. The first man say, "I want to be twice as smart and twice as handsome!" And the bird goes poof! And the man is twice as smart and twice as handsome. The second man says "I want to be 4 times as smart and 4 times as handsome!" THe bird goes poof and the man turns into a dog!
I bet you looked at that picture and said, "OH NO what has happened to poor Shelby!?! She has never looked so terrible!"
It is not a picture of me! It's is my brother Jimmy. I has to admit he has gotten a little bit less ugly but he am still no Shelby.
But he gots snow! He says it is like ice cream! And he gets to stand in it! Look his face is all covered in it!
This is not fair! I needs to stand in a yard fulls of ice cream!