February 16, 2006
I is now 9 months old!
I is now 9 months old.
Three quarters of a year!
Hard to believe, isn't it. I has had so many adventures and learned so much. Why, I thinks back and if only I had known then, when I was 8 months, what I know now.
They calls that wisdom. I guess I is just very very wise.
This is a little great movie I has made.
See, I talks to this computer and tells it what to do and it does it!
I tells it “Say this to my friends!” and it does it. You is seeing this now, see?
I has told it, “Makes a great movie!” And it did!
And it made a movie about me!
If you is going to make a great movie I guess I has to be in it!
And I is not charging you nothing for it either!
I is just so great!
February 14, 2006
Yesterday I was a rescue dog!
I is always a hero but this time I really saved somebody! And it were another dog!
I was at work and doing my job when I sees a dog walking down the road. At first I thought it were a cat!
When I saw it was a dog I went up to it but it was very very scared. I says to him, “I is Shelby and I is the greatest dog in the world!”
And he says, “I is lost and I is scared!” He don't talk so good as me.
So I says, Okay scared little dog you follows me and I will protects you!“ See there he is trying to keeps up with me. You can only see my tail and I was going real real slow too.
I took him to see David cause he is stupid but he is pretty smart about some things.
David says, ”This dog is lost. He has no tags!“
I said, ”I knows he is lost David.“ See, I told you he can be pretty stupid.
So I leaves David to do whatever it is he thinks he does while I went and did all the important work.
I was going to teach the little dog how not to be afraid!
He says, ”I knows how to not be afraid but I is lost!“
So I says, ”You is not lost! You is with me!“
And he says, ”That is true! I isn't afraid no more! Lets play!“
Then I has to tell him. ”Only stupid ugly smelly cats go to the bathroom inside!“
he says, ”What! I don't want to be no stupid ugly cat!“ That were the smartest thing he said in all the time I knowed him.
So I takes him outside and teaches him to go to the bathroom like a dog. I tells him, ”You is almost cat size so you has to be very careful and make sure you does nothing but dog things!“
He thanks me a lot for that and says, ”Shelby you sure is smart!'
I tells him I know that!
Then you know what? David found the little dogs person! I don't know how he did it but he did it. I told you he could be smart. I will keep teaching him too.
Then David tells me something I can'ts believe. He tells me that some dogs doesn't have no people! I thought he was trying to trick me but it is true! Some dogs has no one to take care of!
I think this is pretty terrible so I put my big brain to working on it.
I has a plan!
I hates litter! I is always picking up cans and stuff people leave where good dogs are playing and walking. So I says we should sell that garbage I has been saving up and buy them good dogs some people!
David says that wouldn't work but I'm not sure he thought hard enough about it and his brain is not so big as mine. David says he is going to take them cans and buy them dogs with no people some food!
Now you knows I is not giving away good food real easy. I is a poor dog and I is always hungry but when I think of dogs with no people I gets very sad so I says David can use my little tiny bit of money and buy them dogs some food.
So today we did!
Tomorrow after I has doctored my patients we is going with my friend Holly and take them dogs who has to live in the shelter some good food.
I'll bet they'll be happy cause then they'll know that Shelby is they friend!
February 11, 2006
This is Doctor Karen's Baby!
That am Claire! Isn't she cute! She is almost as cute as me! Almost!
Dr Karen is sleeping. I is glad that she is smart enough to have two good dogs to protect her and the baby. If only she had been smart enough to name that cute baby Shelby!
Dr Karen is not my doctor for a while. I miss her. She is a very good doctor for a dog.
I has a new doctor and he is crazy! He is! He tried to poke me in my but! I told him I is a young ladie and there will be none of that going on!
I told him I would tell Doctor Karen on him!
This is a picture of me at the doctor's. I is just so beautiful even when I is being mediacalled.
The doctor was right about one thing. Trying to take care of david is making me crazy! You can't teaches him much of anything!
While I was there I invented not one but TWO brand new games.
They is very good games.
They are great games cause I has invented them!
My brother Jimmy has wrote me saying he can't believe how I can do so much. Jimmy, it am because I am so great.
I can't deny it. I is just great. It is a lot of work being great.
Jimmy, they say it am going to snow tonight. I has a spoon all ready! Soon I will have a yard full of ice cream just like you!
But I was telling you about my new games!
One game is great even if it is very stupid. But it proves how smart I is!
See, what I does is this: I runs around and tries to make David catches me. I usually has something he wants very badly like a good stick or a frisbee. It is important that he wants it very bad or else the game don't work!
What I does is runs away from him and pretends to drop the stick and stuff and then when he goes to get it I scoops it up and runs away laughing!
Pretty soon David gets very sad cause he realizes he is never ever going to catch me. Now this is the good part of the game.
You has to wait until he is just about to quit and go cry or something and then you know what you do?
You goes up and gives him the stick!
David is so surprised that he will throws the stick and then you gets to chase it and start the game all over again!
My other great game is called, “If David gets a stick the world will blows up!” See in the picture, you has to run around and get ALL the sticks in the world! It is very hard.
It is hard cause I can't get no more than three sticks in my mouth! So I has to pick them up and runs around and when I sees David going for a stick I has to drops the ones I is carrying and go steals I mean gets the stick David is going to!
It is a very good game!
February 9, 2006
This is a fine kettle of fish!
We finally has a new computer in the house.
Not that it will do me any good. It is supposed to be MY computer but mean old bully David has stole it from me. HE DID!
I was telling him that he has broked the old computer so this one he was supposed to fix up so I could talk to it and you could read everything just perfect! And he was supposed to make it so that when you writes me I can hear it in doggish.
AND THAT WAS ALL HE WAS SUPPOSED TO DO!
There isn't nothing else I do with a computer and cause I is so smart I figured this computer would last a kajillion years!
But he has put the computer up too high so I can only talks at it with his help! I want to boss the computer!
When the Postman bought my computer I guarded it real good. Oh I was fierce! Nobody stoled it did they!
I was thinking about all the good jokes I was going to tell the computer but I forgot to protect it from David!
Oh he says I can use it whenever I want. BUT I WANT TO USE IT ALL THE TIME!
I has important things to say sometimes and I has no time to ask some old David permission!
I is so mad. I was going to send you some great jokes and some great pictures that was so beautiful cause they was of me of course!
Now I is just going to sit around and be mad until I gets some good treats!
Technorati Tags: puppy
February 5, 2006
David has broked my computer!
I was going to spend the day tellings you about what they is doing wrong in the SuperBowl. I knows you is waiting for an expert to tell you things.
You may have noticed I says I was going to.
That am because David has broked my computer. I don't even know for sure you is going to get this important message.
It will be okay though. One of my friends is getting me a new computer.
You notice I said one of my friends that is because DAVID WILL NOT TOUCH MY NEW COMPUTER! It is just for me! My friends is very nice and knows how important I is. I will thanks them by writing very good stuffs.
I is David's friend but he doesn't know how to drive a computer as good as me and I can't take a chance on him breaking another one. I will have my new computer Valentines Day. I bet you can hardly wait.
So you go and watch the SuperBowl. I is sorry I can't be explaining it to you. You won't understand it but try and have fun.
If you don't has fun:
Technorati Tags: puppy