October 31, 2007
Don't be scared!
It am ME! Shelby!!
Isn't this a great day! You get to walk up to people and yells at them and then they has to gives you treats.
If Halloween didn't exist I would have invented it!
I has a lot to show you but first I has to stop playing and be real serious.
That great dog Noelle who I teached up real good has lost her forever home. I feel really bad cause I made her a promise that she would have her forever home.
Noelle says she knows it were not my fault and she likes where she is staying but she needs a much gooder forever home.
I will keep thinking and trying to figure stuff out.
This am not as important as Noelle but it am very serious.
Blue am this BOY dog who stays at my house. He stoled my computer and said some things. He said he am sorry but he was sorrier after his butt was bit, let me tell you!
I is going to be a lawyer now. I has some evidence to show you.
Now. You is probably noticing something. Does you notice that I does not try and bites Blue's butt?
Then you has probably noticed that Blue, for that am him, am trying to bite MY BUTT!
Of course he could not bite my butt.
So it am pretty obvious: WHO AM THE BULLY!
It sure aint me!
Blue is still my friend.
Now we can thinks about more Halloween stuff.
That am my friend Jack.
That am a pretty good costume. I thought he was dressed up like a waiter at a fancy restaurant. Jack says I is crazy and that anyone can see he am a great secret agent who goes driving around in big fast cars and saving people all the time!
Okay, I can see that.
I has to squint my eyes real hard but I can see that.
AND LOOK AT THIS!
That am my brother Jimmy!
He am SUPERDOG!
I is very impressed.
Of course we knows that I is the only real Superdog but Jimmy sure does pretend good.
It is a very good costume.
His mom, who am my aunt made him that costume.
You am probably noticing that I am not showing off the fancy costume David made for me.
There am a good reason for that.
SELFISH OLD DAVID DIDN'T MAKE ME NO COSTUME!
There am Ben.
Ben is a scarecrow.
I don't know if the costume am any good though.
There were a awful lot of crows in my yard today.
Maybe it will work gooder on people than on birds.
Birds am pretty smart. They are much smarter than people.
I has never seed a person flying by and I am always looking at the sky.
What I is thinking is that maybe a short fuzzy scarecrow will scares people!
It am important that people be scared cause when they is scared they will go, “OH NO! It is a short scary fuzzy scarecrow! Help us!” And they will drop they entire bowl of candy then we can eats it and laughs.
People is very funny when they is scared.
Of course, I is never scared!
This am David's costume for me.
He thinks I am a clown.
I just don't know what to do about him sometimes.
I is the greatest joke telling dog in the world but I is not no clown let me tell you.
I will tell you my Halloween joke.
What do you sees when you sees me as a ghost?
A BOO-tiful dog!
Okay, here's a gooder one.
Where did the ghost throws the football?
Over the GHOUL line!
Why is they no werewolves around my house?
They is scared of me!
What will Blue look like if he beats up anymore of my toys?
You be safe this Halloween.
That am a order!
October 29, 2007
I am making my confession
I am in so much trouble.
Its not my fault. Really, it isn't. Not all my fault, anyway.
Its just that Shelby, ever since she's been here, all I hear about is how great she is, what a great fighter she is, all the great adventures she has. “Shelby's such a good doctor dog!” “Did you know she's a brilliant lawyer dog as well?” On and on and on, that's all they talk about!
By the way, my name is Blue. I'm pretty famous too, don't you know. Blue Stop That, every where I go people are always shouting that at the top of their voices.
People get pretty excited whenever I'm around.
But my BIG trouble with Shelby started when we was out playing. One thing you know about Shelby is that she is a real dog about biting butts! She'll bite your butt for almost nothing! I mean, just try and take her Kong or something! WHAM, your butt is bit! I know, boy do I know.
I bet I get my butt bit for using her computer without asking!
I don't know how else to tell her. I sure don't want my butt bit anymore than it has been!
Shelby and I were out hunting rabbits. She was saying I have to learn to catch something like a rabbit before I can hunt dinosaurs with her and Ben. We watched a lot of Bugs Bunny cartoons so I was a little bit nervous about this rabbit thing. I just started to talk about France. I'm a French Poodle so I figure I probably know some stuff about France that Little Miss Know-It-All doesn't.
I'd only been telling her all the great things I know about France for 20 minutes or so, just talking all intelligent about stuff like how French for dog is “chein” and how poodles are great hunting dogs. I was just fascinating!
I know I was cause Shelby didn't say nothing for the whole time.
Then she said, “I'm from Belgium. Belgium am better than France. You never even been to France!”
I was just floored and said as polite as bees wax, “WHAT! FRANCE IS A LOT BETTER THAN DINKY OLD BELGIUM! AND GIRLS ARE TERRIBLE DRIVERS!”
Od course I said that while I was running away. Shelby has a terrible temper and any little thing just sets her off!
While she was chasing me she said, “France don't even has no football!”
I said, “You're just a stupid girl! France won the World Cup in football!”
That sure stopped her!
Shelby said, “Football? I is a football coach, I has never coached in no World Cup! Wait, you don't mean football you mean soccer!”
I can be pretty brave when I've got a car between Shelby and my butt. I said, “You're stupid! Soccer is football and its the most popular sport in the world and they don't let girls coach it!”
If you look real close at that picture there you can see where Shelby bit my butt! It hurt so terrible. I bet there was blood and everything. Just cause you can't see it doesn't mean its not there!
I was so mad. Shelby is such a bully!
I was so mad I went home a chewed up some of my mom's delicious shoes!
When my mom came and found them she knew it was me who did it!
AND SHE DIDN'T EVEN CATCH ME DOING IT!
She said I was a bad boy and everything!
I felt real terrible about it. People are so mean to a dog who never does anything bad. Shelby told me that and it is true! Then I realized!
I bet Shelby told on me!
I bet she did!
What do you do when you are so mad at somebody who is a terrible mean butt biter.
What can you do when you need to get even with somebody who is a great fighter.
I was so mad I did a very very bad thing. But she deserved it.
There is this toy that smells like Shelby and like her brother. Shelby calls it Blue Jimmy.
I got that toy and I pretended it was Shelby!
I beat it up real good. Just the way I'd beat up Shelby if she didn't fight back!
I could beat Shelby up real easy if she'd be nice enough to just stand still and take it.
I was thinking all that stuff when I realized: I had killed Blue Jimmy.
I didn't mean to.
I bet Shelby is going to beat me up when she reads this.
That's not fair. You shouldn't beat up a dog who feels real sorry for enjoying doing a bad thing.
It's not fair.
She'll probably get Ben to help her beat me up.
Everybody;s so mean to me and it is really everybody else's fault!
If everybody was nice to me and just gave me everything I wanted and listened to everything I said and did everything I told them to do I'd never get mad at nothing and then I'd never get into trouble and they wouldn't all look at me mean and I'd be happy. Now I'm scared of getting beat up.
AND I AM SAYING I'M SORRY even if its not my fault.
It was just a dumb old toy even if it was a present from your brother.
You shouldn't scare a dog Shelby. You should be nice to me and take me dinosaur hunting cause rabbits is a lot scarier than dinosaurs and you know it.
October 25, 2007
Ben and me got bored
So we decided to go have us some adventures!
Sometimes it am very difficult to have good adventures. Sometimes you has to pretend stuff.
Pretend stuff is pretty good but it am nowhere near as good as real adventures.
I was thinking this when Ben made us have a pretty good adventure.
We nearly caughted us a SNAKE!
A snake bited me once! Right on my foot!
Ben said this weren't no biting snake. Ben is pretty smart. Not so smart as a girl but lots smarter than every other boys I has met! (Yes, that do include dumb old David.)
Because most of you is not scientists I has to explain.
Snakes am little dinosaurs!
That am why they bited me. Dinosaurs all know how delicious I is.
Something else even most scientists doesn't know. Snakes has got teeny tiny invisible feets!
They do so! Just cause you don't learns that in school that don't make it not true!
If snakes don't have little feets then how does they move? I bet you got no answer for that do you!
I has never seed no snake just lying there like a dumb old stick! I bet you hasn't either.
I think they keeps they feets invisible to fools people.
Let me tell you once me and Ben starting chasing this here snake he moved really really fast! We chased him all the way down to the River Shelby!
You remember the river I has discovered? The River Shelby am such a elegant name. It am a much better name than the Shelby River. Ben thinks so too. I told you he were smarter than most boys!
You see what were in my river?
DUCKS! They was trespassing on my river! They does terrible things in my water. They really does.
Ben was as mad as me and we chased them all away!
There am one duck I does like. DAFFY DUCK!
He makes me laugh. But I has seed what kind of carrying ons he gets up to and I is not letting any of that stuff happen in my river let me tell you!
See how beautiful my river am WITH NO DUCKS!
It am very beautiful. That am how you can be sure it am my river!
Even Ben thinks it am beautiful he can't sees it but he can smells it.
Ben says, “Jumping Jehosophat! This river smelled terrible before, Shelby. It stinked just like a duck! But now that all them ducks are gone. It is just beautiful!”
We goed on and had even better adventures but, you already guessed it. It am pretty easy to guess. Dumb old David broked the camera!
He said, “It's not broken, Shel. The batteries just need charging.”
Huh huh. I says, if it can't take no pictures it am broked!
You can see how I is right.
Since I has no pictures to prove what great adventures I has had. I is giving you a treat!
This am my way of saying thanks you. You has sent me some pretty good ideas for my Halloween costumes! Pretty good.
So I is going to show you a special treat! Cause a great costume am going to help me gets treats! See how fair is is.
Of course my treats am better. It am special pictures of me when I was a baby! David, of course, lost these and my friends, of course, has saved them! YAY for my friends!
You can enjoy them now
October 20, 2007
I has got a problem!
You is saying to yourself, “This is impossible! How can Shelby have a problem?!?”
I know but it is true.
It am so terrible I even has to ask you for some helps with it!
Before I does that I will tell you about my life. I know my life am much more interesting than yours. If its not then why is you reading this! See, that am logic.
They won't let me doctor! They won't let the greatest doctor dog in the world work!
I can't affords to lose me another job let me tell you, not when I lives with someone as cheap as you know who.
When I talks to them they say they doesn't has no doctor dogs cause they is afraid of infection! This am pretty smart. I sure don't want me to get no infections let me tell youI
So I tells them not to worry I has had all my shots and even though they sticks me with a mile long needle that really hurts and I never cried I is pretty sure I is save from getting infected.
But they still says NO!
They is very stupid.
I is going to find me some patients don't you worry about that. I is trying to paint me a sign to put on the front door: Doctor Shelby Am Now Seeing New Patients. Please Has You Nickels Ready
It is very hard painting.
Then when I steals all the patients from them stupid doctors who don't know how great us dog doctors is I is going to know something let me tell you.
See that am how you solve problems.
So now you is even more confused and saying to yourself, “Shelby always knows how to solve terrible big problems! What terrible big problem has she got that she needs my help with? I know, I'll bet she needs help because she has to live with dumb old boys now!”
My problem is not dumb old boys. I knows how to handle them.
My problem am with a boy - of course. It am DAVID. He is a cleaning maniac!
Maniac am a word that means CRAZY. It am from the latin man, which am another word for boy and ick, which means icky disgusting; which may be another word for boy. So Maniac means a disgusting boy.
David am a cleaning maniac! He am always cleaning everything and then he always runs out of things to clean and starts looking at ME!!
I is terrible worried about this cause I works so hard on looking good and smelling good, I keeps myself so beautiful and then David comes along and ruins it.
WHAT IS I GOING TO DO!
It am a good thing one of the things I is best at is making you figures things out!
I hates baths.
You has been writing to me with some pretty good ideas for names for my dinosaur. You has also been asking me some pretty stupid questions.
The stupidest question am, “Shelby are those boy dinosaurs or girl dinosaurs?”
How stupid is that.
Just thinks a minute.
Would a smart girl dinosaur be stupid enough to want to fight me?
Would a girl dinosaur be stupid enough to get caught even by a super genius?
Of course they am all boy dinosaurs!
The next stupidest question am, “Shelby, what am wrong with your Trojans?”
What am wrong is that I is not coaching them!
When they is not on TV I can't study them and yells at them to do the right thing and scores them Touchdowns!
Now I has fixed up my TV and will be studying them hard. They sure won't be losing any more of them games!
Now most of you know I is a Trojan but I was borned a Buckeye. You has probably noticed that Ohio am number 1! And I hardly has to help them at all.
It am time now for me to go watches me some football. I misses coaching football players and playing games against them Wildcats and stuff.
I is also getting excited about Halloween. That am a day when you gets to go bug you neighbors and makes them gives you food or gets to plays tricks on them.
Of course I is the greatest trick playing dog in the world so this am a good chance for me to proves it again!
I is trying to figures out my costume. See, no matter what costume I wears everybody always knows it am me!
I is just too beautiful sometimes.
October 15, 2007
You is probably saying to yourself
“Now that Shelby is all world famous for catching all those dinosaurs I bet she doesn't talk to us anymore!”
Some people may be like that. Some people.
You has forgetted. I is not a people. I is Shelby!
Yes, I is very famous. That is just part of my job of being the greatest dog in the world.
Sometimes I just thinks and realizes there is probably nothing I can't do greater than anybody else in the whole world. It is a big responsibility being so great and having to take care of stupid David.
Oh people is all jealous of course but I am used to that. They is not jealous of me having to take care of David. They is jealous I is so great!
One big responsibility I has is I has to figure out what to do with all them dinosaurs I has!
Robin here, that am him. He am a boy. Robin thinks I should give him a dinosaur so he can has it beats up people who was means to him!!
For a boy that is not a terrible idea. Except he am forgetting that I am Shelby and if there is anyone being means to a dog I is the best beater upper they is!
Now then, Blue, who am that guy other there. He am also a boy.
<-- That am Blue. Blue thinks I should let him try and beat up a dinosaur.
I thinks he am trying to show me how tough he is by beating up a piece of paper. I don't know.
I tries to explain to him that after I has beaten them up they is going to not be wanting to fight no kind of dogs, not even boy dogs. that am a part of my dinosaur training philosophy. (Philosophy am a big word I has learned. It means the way I does things.) So Blue thinks I should rent them out to be spys! Dinosaurs am such good hiders that they could hide and get peoples secrets and drive fast cars! BOYS!
That dog standing behind Blue am my next door neighbor Copper. She is a pretty good girl dog. She says “GIVE ME THEM DINOSAURS SHELBY SO I CAN EAT THEIR TOES!”
Which am pretty much what everybody am saying to me.
David idea was, “Shelby, we should give the dinosaurs to science so that we can learn from them.” You notice he do not say sell them to science. He do not say gives them to science so science can puts them in a big bus and takes them around the world to meets all my friends. You notice he do not say that!
Which am why his is the dumbest idea!
Ben had him a pretty good idea. See Ben was thinking this. We takes all them dinosaurs and we takes they toes! Then we opens us up a booth and sells them!
You knows how delicious dinosaur toes is. They taste just exactly like cheeseburger pizza ice cream only gooder!
Then Ben says by the time we sell all them toes them dinosaurs will had growed them back new toes and we can sells them again!
They is two problems with this.
First one am very important. I promised that big dinosaur who nobody has named yet, that I would not let his toes be eated. And since he am so big you knows his toes is the best tasting. It is very important when you makes a promise that you keeps that promise. It is to me anyway.
Second problem is that them dinosaurs toes is so good we would has to charge FIVE NICKELS A PIECE for them. That means only the richest of the rich peoples could affords them and that means we would has to wait and wait to sells them.
I is a action dog and I can't wait for nothing!
The third problem is that with all that waiting for rich people to drives by we would get hungry and with a big old booth full of dinosaur toes, well, we would eats up our money!
We would. It would just happen!
So even if Ben's idea were pretty good for a boy it were still a boys idea and needs a girl to think through it so it comes out right.
In this case that means coming out right means we not going to do it!
So we is going to have my plan. Which you know am the goodest plan anyway.
I is going to teaches them dinosaurs to not eats people and not to steps on people and then I is going to invites all my friends over to play with them!
Of course you will has to gives me a nickel to plays with them but that am only fair. It am a lot of work to trains a dinosaur.
October 9, 2007
This am probably the greatest adventure you has ever been told
It were a dark and stormy morning.
Me and my buddy Ben knewed that we had figured out where them dinosaurs was living.
For a week we has been smelling and looking.
We knowed there were only one place left for them to be.
We does our equipment check.
Ben am very stylish. He was wearing his safari jacket. It has pockets. If I had me pockets I'd fill them full of treats!
Ben used them pockets to keep his extra special elephant catching weapons!
I double checked: I had me teeth and my feets.
I were ready.
Ready to hunt me some DINOSAURS!!
It were raining. That am good for dinosaur hunting.
They is very very big and they don't make no bath tubs that am dinosaur sized. The only time them dinosaurs gets cleaned up is when it rains. They has to run outside with they brushes, soaps and shampoo get all lathered up and then rinses it all off.
With the noise from the rain and with all that dinosaurs singing in the showers they can't hear you sneaking up on them!
And when they gets soaps in they eyes them old dinosaurs can't see you!
David had him a good idea! I know, I couldn't believes it either. He says, “Shelby, if you takes a bath then the dinosaurs can't smell you either!”
It were a good idea. But I hates baths so I ran outside and took me a dinosaur style shower!
You has to be very smart like me to hunt dinosaurs and to gets out of having baths!
So Ben and me started to hunt!
It were very exciting.
We was deep in the woods. There weren't no people. People am afraid of dinosaurs so not seeing no people meant we was getting closer.
Suddenly Ben whispers to me, “Look up there. I smells a dinosaur! But I smells it up high!”
I told you that even if Ben can't see with his eyes he am a great nose smelling seeing dog, cause he were right!
Up on the roof there were a DINOSAUR! IT WERE A FLYING DINOSAUR!!
I knows all about you doubting Wilburs and Doubting Steffis. You is saying, “Shelby! That is not a dinosaur! That is just a big bird!”
<-- Look right there. I think we can all says that am a bird.
Now goes back and look at the flying dinosaur.
Notice anything different?
A BIRD AM NOT AS BIG AS A HOUSE! It has a tiny little bitty beak and not a big old mouth full of sharp teethes!
Ben whispers at me some more, “Shelby, you jumps up there and catches that dinosaur!”
I whispered back, “Ben, that flying dinosaur am on top the house! I can't jumps that high!”
Ben whispered, “I thought you were tough Shelby!”
Just then this GIANT DINOSAUR COMES RUNNING OUT!
It shouted at us in this great big voice that made the trees shake!
“WHO HAS COME INTO MY HOUSE! I WILL BEAT YOU UP!”
I yelled right back at him, “I is Shelby and I has come to beats you up and to catches you!”
That dinosaur said, “You is Shelby? The great dinosaur hunting dog?”
I said, “Yes I is! Put 'em up!”
And that big old dinosaur just turned around and ran away as fast as he could.
Me and Ben were chasing him but every time we'd get close he'd yell real loud and run even faster! He was running through fences and trees.
Ben and me had to stop chasing him. We was laughing too hard to keeps running!
While we was laughing and making each other laugh even harder by pretending to be a scared dinosaur that big old dinosaur come back with his friends!!
This guy was really really big!
He said, “I understand that you are Shelby the great dinosaur hunting dog! I stopped taking my shower so I could come to fight you!”
Now this dinosaur was about a kajillion times bigger than me! So you know what I did. I said, “I always likes me a good fight in the morning! Lets go!”
Oh it were a terrible good fight! He was big but I am so fast and I has such sharp teeth. We was fighting for about half a day. Ben was running around shouting, “Get him, Shelby! Give him one in the bread basket!”
When some of that dinosaurs buddies would try to jump in and help that dinosaur Ben was right on him biting and snarling telling them cheating dinosaurs, “We'll have a fair fight here boys or you'll have to deal with me and Shelby!”
We was fighting and fighting real good. I has to say this that dinosaur he weren't no quitter!
All of a sudden this guy here comes flying down. This place is pretty big for people and dinosaurs flying around is all I have to say. But this guy comes flying down kind of shouting and singing, “Here I come to save the day!”
And I shouts back at him, “I don't need no saving! I is winning this fight!”
“I can see that,” the flying guy said, “I'm here to save that poor old dinosaur!”
Then Ben shouts at him, “Don't you know that is Shelby! She'll fight you as soon as this dinosaur says UNCLE!”
The flying guy says, “That's THE Shelby?! The Shelby?!?!?!”
Ben says, “Darn tooting!” Ben says a lot of stuff like that. I have no idea what he means.
And the flying guy says, “Sorry Mr. Dinosaur! You is on your own! I can't fight Shelby!” And he flew away twice as fast as he got there he left!
When he heard that flying guy the dinosaur said, “Oh no, no one can help me! I can't beat you Shelby. You are the greatest fighting dog in the world. I say, ”UNCLE“! I will let you tame me and do what you tell me to.”
You can see I was pretty tired but I could have fought 3 more dinosaurs easy!
When the other dinosaurs saw this big guy say uncle they was all scared! Ben barked at them and chased them into a cage!
While Ben was herding him this one guy here says, “I am sure glad I didn't have to fight Shelby or you Mr Ben! You're the toughest two dogs I've ever seen!”
Ben is the kind of guy who just sticks to business. While he was herding them dinosaurs into a cage he stopped and caught him an ELEPHANT!
He were very proud of that!
I still has no idea why Ben caught him a cow. I figure he were just hungry.
Matter of fact I KNOWS he was hungry!
He wanted to start right in and eat that big dinosaur's toes!
I said, “Ben, this dinosaur has fought me pretty good. I don't think we should eat his toes.”
Ben said, “But Shelby, you can just smells how delicious they is going to taste!”
“I know, Ben,” I says, “But you has to admit he were a great fighting dinosaur. I think we should not eat his toes and let him be our friend.”
Ben thought a couple of minutes. I know, Ben is the only boy I has ever met who thinks!
Then he says, “You're right Shelby. We won't eat his toes and maybe we can go off and have more adventures!”
And the big dinosaur, who I hasn't named yet said, “YAY! I is so glad you isn't going to eat my toes! That would hurt! Even If I grows back new ones it hurts when people bites off your toes!”
So we is now all friends and everybody knows I is the greatest dinosaur fighting dog in the world!
October 2, 2007
This sure weren't no great start!
See my poor little foot?
It has got a band aid on it!
I has gotten bit by a dinosaur.
It hurt very bad but I didn't cry! Not one little tear.
You can never lets dinosaurs know they has hurt you cause if they think that they has hurt you they just goes to their homes and laughs at you!
There is nothing I can think of worse than being laughed at by a dinosaur. Can you think of something worse?
I can think of something near as bad.
That is being doctored by David! He am no doctor let me tell you.
One important thing a doctor learns is that you never ever yells at the patient for bleeding on they floors.
I think that is rule number two.
Rule number one is make sure you gets paid!
It were a good morning for dinosaur hunting.
Dinosaurs is the kind of animal that when it is warm they blood runs faster and they thinks gooder.
When it am real cold they just stays home and watches TV. I don't know what it is they watches. You people is always asking me questions like that. How would I know. I don't has no TV right now and it is terrible! So how can I knows what dinosaurs is watching when I can't watch TV to see what they is watching!
You has to ask better questions.
But when it is cool like it was today dinosaurs is much stupider than usual. They is still excellent hiders though and they is still good listeners so you always has to be very alert and very very quiet when you is hunting them.
Now that am Blue and Robin and me of course. You can see I still watching out for dinosaurs. I knows I must be very delicious and since a dinosaur has tasted me he is probably out there thinking he like to get another bite of some delicious Shelby!
You see Blue and Robin isn't thinking that. That am because boys probably tastes terrible!
We will probably go out hunting again tomorrow.
I is not giving up till I shows all you guys how great I is.
I doesn't understands why all you Doubting WIlburs has to be showed this over and over.
But catching dinosaurs am a lot of fun!
Even Robin am still excited. I does has to teaches him that you just can't look at the same place over and over again. He thinks that am hunting!
October 1, 2007
I is going on another great adventure!
I is telling you now just in case!
You see this week I is going to be gone hunting dinosaurs!
I has seen evidence that they is around.
You sees what happens is when dinosaurs gets really scared they drops they tails off! Them tails turns into wood that am a special kind that makes oil. Oil is what makes your car go.
You can see why dinosaurs am so valuable.
But I has also figured something else out. When them dinosaurs loses they tails they grows another one right back!
I saw it on television.
Being a super genius who am also a doctor and a great hunter I is combining all my talents.
I is going to catch this dinosaur and makes him tell me how they grows them tails back!
When I finds it out I is going to charges you to give you the secret!
I is so smart!
Just think, you could be walking along and your leg falls off! Your mom would be all excited and saying stuff like, “OH NO, your leg has fallen off! What will we do!”
She will probably try and glue it back on but you will be all calm and say, “Don't you worry mom. We will just go see Dr Shelby! And I will grows me a new leg that will be better than this one. It will never fall off! Dr Shelby guarantees it!”
Then your mom will say, “Oh no! But that must cost so much! How will we ever afford it!”
You say, “Mom. This is Dr Shelby! Of course she is expensive. It will probably cost us a whole nickel! And she doesn't give credit. You has to pay in advance. But isn't a brand new leg that will never fall off worth it?”
That am great logic see? I is going to be so rich!
I is taking my new pals with me.
I know you is thinking, “Shelby, them pals of your is all boys! They will never be able to fight a dinosaur as good as you!”
You is thinking very good. You has forgot that I is a genius! What I will do is send them boys off where I know they is no dinosaurs, but I won't tell them that!
Them boys will be off there galumphing around and them smart good hiding dinosaurs will say, “Stupid boys is hunting us! We had better hide over here!”
Then you know who will be hiding there to catches them big old dinosaurs! Of course you do. It will be ME!!
Them boys am not all excited about hunting dinosaurs. They is too scared to say they is just afraid.
I is making them go anyway for they own good. I will braves them up some.
They isn't getting none of them nickels I earns though!
It will be me doing the fighting and catching and being a super genius who am a doctor!
Ben wants to go. He is a fighting guy and not scared of much except baths. Baths are a pretty good thing to be a scared of.
I'm not scared of them. I just hates them!
Ben just might be, just might be tough enough to fights a dinosaur. He says he has beats up plenty of elephants and two or three elephants are almost as big as a little tiny dinosaur.
I might keeps him in reserve just in case one of them dinosaurs gets a lucky punch in!
Robin thinks it will be fun!
It will be fun but only if you is a great fighter like me!
I figures Robin is going to just get all excited and bark-y for the hunting part. He is not much of a fighting dog.
He says he is a lover.
When he says that I just rolls my eyes, just like I is doing now!
I will let you know what happens and I will make David gets some pictures of them dinosaurs I plans to catch.
It will be very very dangerous but don't you worry. I is always Shelby!
Here am a big surprise picture my aunt has sended to me.
That person am her but do you know who that beautiful little baby is!
IT AM ME!!
Isn't I the most precious thing you ever seed!