I Am The Greatest Dog In The World!

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January 9, 2008

I has got a super important major crime cases to solves!

They is a kajillion stories in the big city.
This am one of them.
It were a dark and stormy night. I were sitting at my desk eating cookies when there were a knock on the door!
“Comes in! But I isn't sharing no cookies!” I said.
The door opened and a red hot pistol of a red head were there. It were Ben.
Ben am my friend. We has worked together on dozens of cases. I had called him to come to my room because we had us a big case. A really big case. The Case I call "Who The Heck Got Crazy And Stole All The Good Snow"!
Yes. It were true. Just yesterday my yard were looking all like this. Plenty of the white stuff for rolling in, playing in and for eating!
Then today.
NO SNOW!
It were a mystery! And mysteries am my business!
Really, eating cookies am my business. I just likes mysteries for the fun!
Ben said, "This looks like a pretty big case Shelby. I had better put on my detective coat so we can go investigate it!"
I can't believe Ben has him a coat for every occasion. So we waited while he changed his clothes and then we were off on the chase!
We weren't chasing nothing but it am a lot of fun to say, "We is off on the chase!" It makes things more exciting when you says that. You can try it!
First Ben went and smelled by the tree where we had us some real good eating snow. He smelled him a real long time. "Thunderations, Shelby. Our snow is gone! "
"I has already detected that Ben. Does you smell any bad guys?" I said. "It is what I don't smell Shelby. I don't smell any cats!"
Ho ho! I just thought that. I didn't say that. Who doesn't likes good snow, I thought. CATS don't likes snow! They doesn't. I has studied them and when they gets snow on them they is always flickering around with they feets like crazy things!
You is probably think that being a crazy thing am what a cat does best but I means crazy thing even for a cat!
Now we had us a suspect! A suspect am somebody you just knows has did it but because I is also a great lawyer dog it means that you has to proves it so that only a crazy person or David won't know they is the guilty ones!
Now I really had to investigate and do detectivating.
I looked everywhere for clues. Just everywhere.
We found this place. It were very mysterious. Ben smelled it and said he figured it were a Mystic Temple!
A mystic Temple is where bad guys gets them up to no good. Anything bad could happen here. People might even pet cats! It am scary but it am true!
It were scary but we smelled this secret place up real good. We figured we was getting closer to the criminals!
Then we found us some really disturbing evidence! These crooks were stupid!
Look they has stoled all the snow but they left big hunks of it around! They even lefts some ice! How stupid is they is what I was thinking! Then I realized the bad guy had to be him a boy!
Only a boy would be so stupid enough to steal all the snows but still leaves big clumps of it lying around. I felts a little bit better, at least we wouldn't have to fight us no smart girl!
We searched and searched us for clues. I would smell up a place and then Ben would comes right behind in case I missed something tiny but important. We wents faster that way!
When suddenly it dawned on me!
I called Ben over and said, "Ben, I has solved it! What has you not smelled?"
Ben said, "Shelby, I has smelled so much stuff that I can't begin to remember what I hasn't smelled!"
Even though Ben am very smart for a boy he am still a boy. "That am all right Ben. I is the detective here and it am my job to remember what we hasn't smelt. Now I knows who the criminal am! It am all alimentary reduction! Come on. We has not time to waste!"
We was off like a squirrel sitting on one of my trees! We runned all the way home. I was thinking all the time. We was about to confront the most dangerous criminal that has ever walked the earth and it were just me and my trusty side kick Ben between evil and the good people of the world!
It weren't that scary but its kind of dumb playing a game where you isn't after the baddest guys in the world. He am pretty bad all right. Bad enough!
When we got home I said, "I has called you all together cause I has solved the case of the crazy guy who has stoled all the snow! It tooks a genius likes me to figure out all them clues. The first clue were it had to be somebody very strong, very big and a boy! The second clue were Ben and me never smelled us no cats! But you know what else we didn't smell? We didn't smell the criminal! The criminal who were smart enough to take away all the cat smells but dumb enough to forget to leaves his own smells. And that criminal am YOU MR BLUE!!"
"CURSES! MY PLOT IS FOILED!" he cried!
Foiled am a boys word. It means we has wrapped this case up!
Then Ben asked, "Why would you do that Blue? Why steal all the good snow?"
"Its because you and Shelby always go off and have great adventures. YOU NEVER TAKE ME! So I decided to have my own great adventure and trick you both!"
"Oh, Blue!" Ben said, shaking his head.
"Since I is the only lawyer here that means I gets to be the judge! And I sentences you Blue to getting your butt bit!"
"OH NO! Anything but that Shelby! I'll be good!"
"See that you is cause these teeths of mine will always be here protecting dogs and kids. These teeths of mine are always here ready to bite bad guys in they butts!"

They is a kajillion stories in this city, This were one of them.
(And I didn't really bite Blue in his butt. I felt sort of sorry for him. I will take him on our next big adventure.)

Posted by Shelby at January 9, 2008 9:05 PM

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Posted by: jimmy at January 12, 2008 3:53 AM

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