Click images for desktop size: "Pin Up Art" by JW McGinnis Still upset about the banks dumping my accounts and giving it to the state.
I still don't think I'm a fault here. It maybe legal but I feel like a victim. I'm stunned that the bank nor the state ever made any effort to contact me. They just took the money. Out of the blue.
I'm looking for someone to blame.
I'd like to blame the bank. Part of it. The charge to loot my account for 40 bucks was $100.00. Now, under the best of circumstances that seems a touch excessive. I'm sure the exorbitant fee is somewhere in one of those small print pamphlets they hand you.
If the state gives them the go ahead I guess they have to hand over the cash . . .
The state wanted their money. When I asked why someone hadn't contacted me they said they didn't have to. It was in the papers I signed for my medical stuff.
It probably was. I might even have read it.

Click images for desktop size: "Grass" by Unknown I keep wondering how a whole state got so desperate for money that they'd go to such extravagant lengths, potentially wrecking lives. I mean, this hurts me but its survivable. What if that were my rent money or the money for a kids operation. I can dispute the charge and get the money back. I give the woman I spoke to credit. She worked hard not to sound smug when she told me the process would take about two years . . .
I keep wondering why my 300 buck maybe debt for subsidized drugs was worth these steps and I keep coming back to Bush and all his tax cuts for the rich. Trickle down doesn't work. The state going to get its money and they're going to get it from the vulnerable, the poor.
Bush is going to give the rich $700 billion bucks because they used all the money he's already given them and blew it. I read somewhere that that's $1,600 for every person in the US. Rah! Could we maybe give three hundred bucks of that to the state so I can get my drugs?
I resent the fact that this money will be used by the investment banks to get themselves richer. There'll be nothing for the people, just for the rich minority.
I have to stop thinking about this. It just depresses me in so many ways. Personally and for my world view.
Getting depressed doesn't do much for anybody except for the rich who like poor people to be too depressed to do much about anything.
I called a couple of high schools and left my number inquiring about being a volunteer coach. I'm not pursuing the first school. Impressions, you see. I have value. If they can't see it then they never will, even if I canoodle them into taking me on staff I'll be the clip board carrier, the xerox boy, or the film indexer.
Those are all important jobs. I have talent greater than that.

Click images for desktop size: "Green Tea" by Michael Puckaz I'm going to keep looking. There's a lot I can do and want to do. I can't drive anymore so that limits me. With my ebike I've got a 10 mile radius I can cover. I look hard enough I'll find something that will work. Every other place I've volunteered in the last 5 years has been able to work around my inability to drive. No one ever indicated it was a big hassle. I wouldn't expect it to be here either.
Looking for work for money and looking for something to do where I can give what I do best for no money. I should be busier.
One bright thing. Its minor but it brings me small pleasure. When my hard drive died I lost my Shonen Knife music collection. I've managed to get some of it back.
A lot of people don't know about Shonen Knife. A lot of people voted for Bush . . . Shonen Knife was one of Kurt Cobain's favorite bands. He requested them and got them to open up for Nirvana on two tours! Red Kross and Sonic Youth have both recorded songs as tributes to them!
More astonishing, to me anyway, is that Shonen Knife, the band, is over 25 years old! They started out as "The Osaka Ramones"!
The got better. At their best they combine that J-Pop bubble gum vitality with a driving pink guitar sound. Naoko Yamano, the guitarist, has the best right hand I've heard in years. She plays with a speed that rivals Johnny Ramone's.
Interestingly she plays often with a pure clean tube sound, where the normal thing today is to take the speed and distort it to give it crunch and drive. Atsuko, Naoko's sister, is the drummer. She keeps the beat.
Click images for desktop size: "Surf" by Unknown She's not as maniacal as I usually like drummers but she keeps a thudding pound going and does nicely on the light frill work.
Their cover of the Monkee's "Daydream Believer" is a nice intro into their poppier sound. It has exuberance and I still like the goofy phonetic english.
In their more "mature" stuff like "Tower Of The Sun" they show a graceful move into more serious modes. I think I prefer the total trash of their classic ode to gooniness "Banana Chips". Long live SHONEN KNIFE!
I'm taking my bike out today to check out dog foods. I need our dogs to have the best possible nourishment. I also need to save money. When the little blind dog was alive we had to be ultra-cautious about foods allowed in the house. He had so many allergies. Now the remaining trio only know they like food! Candide was killer expensive and we finally managed to find a replacement that was about 20% cheaper but still offered all the nutrients and was hypoallergenic! Now, my quest, is to find the nutrients only and save money. I really do miss the company that custom made my dog food in my old state. They even delivered!
Oh, some people will be pleased that my puppy's site has been updated. I'm used to the kids dunning us about it. Some of them want it updated 3 times a day . . . but this time even ADULTS were bugging me!
It had to be done. Its more difficult lately. I didn't even take the pictures. Its not that I'm uninspired but, well, I just miss the little blind dog a lot. Its harder to have reportable adventures without him around.

Posted by David at 10:50 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

Click images for desktop size: "Falling Star" by Emperaa There's a writer, Stanley Elkin. He likes to be identified as a Chicago writer. A pretty select group, I guess.
I can only think of Elkin, Saul Bellow and Sara Paretsky and that fellow who wrote "Man With the Golden Arm", Nelson Algren.
I always think of ALgren as New York based because of all his early TV work. Thing is I always think writers who locate themselves in a particular area are pretty interesting. I mean, Faulkner had his mythic south, Kennedy has Albany New York, Joyce had Dublin and Chandler had L.A.
It always seems that the more specific a good writer gets the more universal his story becomes. I've got no proof of this. Its just the way things feel to me.
Stanley Elkin had multiple sclerosis. It killed him. He was probably thinking about how it was going to kill him when he wrote "The Living End".
"The Living End" is a funny story about this jewish guy who dies. The fellow goes to Heaven. He's disappointed because Heaven really doesn't come up to his expectations. He thinks it looks a lot like Disneyland, but he guesses its better than the alternative.
Suddenly he is confronted by the voice of God. God begins to berate our hero. He condemns him to hell because he once ate a piece of bacon, he wore pants with zippers instead of buttons, he worked on the sabbath. God casts this guy into the darkest pits of hell shouting out his final transgression; "and you thought Heaven looked like an amusement park!"

Click images for desktop size: "Untitled" by Fernando Viecente For this sins the hero is doomed to suffer eternal torment alongside murderers, rapists, child abusers, lawyers . . . That his seemingly minor sins were seen, by God, to be as serious as genocide. A commandment is a commandment. A sin is a sin. Its a funny little book. Too hard to find, I think, but worth picking up.
There's always something about divine justice that horrifies and interests me. I think its pretty normal to at some part of your life to think that you've been hard done by. What's important, I think, is not to let it bug you to the point of being morose or silly or cruel.
I've taken it too far, often. I have an adolescent concept of correctness. My greatest fault has been in not allowing people who love me to be a part of me. Sometimes in idiotically minor ways. To let a player help me set up the field, help me carry stuff when my arms are full.
Click images for desktop size: "The Canyon" by Maxfield Parrish Little meaningless things that might have let them know that I valued them and trusted them to be a part of me.
Its an old true cliche that the easiest way to get someone to feel indebted to you is not to do them a favor but to allow them to do you a favor.
Somehow I turned that into a code. I didn't want to have people feel indebted to me. I feel indebted to so many and sometimes it weighs heavy. I wanted everyone I loved to feel unencumbered, free to pursue their dreams and to help others they met to pursue their dreams.
I have to remind myself that this tic of mine when added to my natural aloofness can make me seem heartless and unfeeling. That's not very important in itself, others perceptions of me. It is important when it makes people think that I think less of them. I don't grasp sometimes that how I feel about people is sometimes important to them. Probably a lot more important to them than how they feel about me.
Its just something I have to remember.
My friend sent me one of those test things that was supposed to tell you how much of an animal lover you are. I had a problem with it. The basic premise was skewed. It relied on a faulty concept that you could only love animals if you hated people . . . there was no lee way in thinking that animals and people are pretty equal in my eyes.
Its that same sort of thinking, not realizing there are alternatives that exist outside of ourselves that plagues me. I have to stay always aware of it or I become nothing except some sort of monstrous saint.

I've been calling the school twice a day trying to reach the HC. I left a message today. If he doesn't call me back I'll move along. There's a limit to how much stalking I'll do to get an unpaying gig.
My friends interview went well. They pointed out she's pretty well over qualified for the position. From what she says her potential immediate superior was the most concerned about this.
She liked the people and the job seemed interesting enough, at this stage, to keep her interested. They were seeing 9 applicants and will start their short list call backs on Tuesday.

Last night watched the last of this summers comic book flics. "The Incredible Hulk fits in nicely between "Iron Man" and "The Dark Knight."
I didn't think it was that good. The acting was fine and for the first time I appreciated Liv Tyler.
Click images for desktop size: "Fat Frac" by NBD I had a hard time thinking of skinny Tim Roth as a quasi killer super soldier . . .
What I liked about the Hulk movie was that he wore purple pants, the Lou Ferrigno and whack Bill Bixby cameos, and that he says, "HULK SMASH!"
I also got excited because the story played out almost like the comic book "Abomination" I remember reading when I was a kid.
I was pretty disappointed in the action. I guess Corey Yuen was a lot more responsible for "The Transporter" than given credit for.
Of course all misgivings were forgotten at the end when Robert Downey Jr enters the bar and gives a hint that there'll be an Avengers movie next summer!
I know it wasn't promised but in these kind of things a hint is more binding than a promise.

Posted by David at 10:40 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Click images for desktop size: "Electric Honey Hornet Mitten" by J3 Designs They finally came and got the old washer and dryer out of here yesterday. Took them all of 7 minutes from entry to exit.
At least it's done. Now I have to write a letter to Sears complaining to get some more compensation. A week of inconvenience and extra work caused their sub-contractor should be compensated,
Right now my friend is off on a job interview. The main attraction in this job is that it is less than a mile from the house!
Oddly her job title will be a reduction in status, from Controller to some sort of accounting manager. But the money will be close to the same . . . I put it down to the vagaries of working for not for profits.
Here present job is a national wilderness preservation group. Well thought of I guess. The job interview is in the same field but only state wide.
There's a small part of me that would like to see her stay at her present job. She's just getting to know the people and likes a few of them well.

Click images for desktop size: "Untitled" by Clarence H Carter But the idea of being able to take the dogs over to meet up for lunch and whatever is more than a little cool.
Plus with the coming depression and the oil company gouging being able to walk to work and/or only having to drive a mile to work means a savings of about $500.00 a month!
And the time factor. Now her job is about 45 minutes a way. This is a 12 minute walk . . .
Its nice going on a job interview when there's no real pressure to get the job. It would just be nicer. Its all cool.
If she has fun on the interview maybe she'll get past being angry with me for not wanting to drive 100 miles to see the Mudhoneys . . .
She say's they're one of the original grunge bands. I think them as a tired punk metal act. I'll probably end up going and then if I hate the show I can use it as leverage to get something I want . . .
I've always had reservations about bands that name themselves after Russ Meyer's flics.

We finally watched "The Dark Knight".
Click images for desktop size: "Evening Wind" by Edward Hopper I was pretty disappointed, especially as I'm a big fan of "Batman Begins".
"Iron Man" was definitely more fun. "The Dark Knight" had some decent moments but it was too thin to be such a long long movie. The acting was fine but not very exceptional. I thought Heath Ledger's Joker was more hammy (hammier?) than even Jack Nicholson's Joker.
Ledger had some decent scenes but they ended up being too mannered for my tastes.
Aside from Morgan Freeman's line about, "You think that one of the wealthiest most powerful men in the world is a vigilante who spends his nights beating criminals to a pulp with his bare hands and you want to blackmail him?" there wasn't much to enjoy here.
The special effects and gismos were okay. The thing I spent most of the time wondering about was how this movie got to be the monster hit that it is.
One thing I found fascinating was that the themes that it hit on most effectively were explored much more touchingly in "A Man Who Was Superman".
"A Man Who Was Superman" has been rising higher and higher in my estimation. It was such a light colored film that explored such dark insidious themes, but it did it with a smile on its face and a far more mature perspective on the world.
"The Dark Knight," at times seemed to be going for the dark for no real purpose than it was the easier thematic way out of things.
I like dark. I like unremitting darkness in movies too, but here they were going for too many other things and it got to be a bit of a mess.
The only thing I actively disliked though was the final battle between Batman and the Joker. The conflict between Gordon and Batman when we know that Bats is always right about this sort of thing, especially in view of the fact that Gordon kept being wrong throughout the movie added nothing but grate for me.
The comics have prepared me for the Joker getting that one lucky punch in that decks Batman but I couldn't quite accept that just whacking Batman with a pipe would get him down. Then for Bats to escape only because of a rather dull gizmo was annoyingly anticlimactic.
I watched WALL-E by myself last night. I didn't get it. I liked WALL-E and the insane cleaning robot but that was it. I didn't get the point of showing people as basically good but as fat non-moving unattractive non-capable creatures.
It made the ending bewildering for me.
There was a time when I would have gotten a kick out of the omnipresent Apple images - the iPod video, the robots re-booting with the Mac chimes, now it just comes across as commercial propaganda aimed at kids.
That's a bit too cynical for me.
Today I'm going to take the ebike to the store to get some dog food. Its about a two hour walk and about 15 minutes on the bike!
I love being mobile.

Posted by David at 9:27 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Click images for desktop size: "Wedding" by Clarence Holbrook Carter There's an apochraphylic story from the sixties.
Lyndon Johnson was running for Senator. He told his campaign manager to start spreading a rumour that his opponent had carnal knowledge of sows.
The campaign manager was aghast. He sputtered, "Mr Johnson, we can't say he's a pig f***er! Its not true!"
In the joke Johnson replied, "I know that. The point is to make him deny it!"
The Republican Party never got the joke.
There latest commercial libeling Obama is a dangerous disgrace.
Implying that Obama is a pedophile goes too far. It harkens back to the evil Nixon "Dirty Tricks" campaign.
It also presents an ugly innuendo about the Republicans. The statement that they are using in their sly innuendo was a plea to teach kindergarten students the difference between good and bad touching from an adult.
Its not unreasonable to purpose that the Republicans don't want children to know the difference. Since they've created the ad its fair to surmise that they are advocating keeping children ignorant and even less able to protect themselves. Any right thinking man could decide that they wanted children ignorant so that they can prey upon them.
One of the few things I whole heartedly agree with Obama about and its twisted like this.
I've worked with young people for a whole lot of years. Its always been important to me that no kid, male or female, ever feel uncomfortable around me. I spend a lot of time in locker rooms with the kids. I've always made it a hard unbreakable rule that no coach, including myself, ever be alone with a kid in those sort of situations. There must always be at least one other coach and one other player. Its not much but its all I could come up. Kids are already woefully ignorant. They are
Click images for desktop size: "Flying Withus Dog" by Flying Wombat 007 vulnerable. They need approval and they need affection. Even 6' 5" 280 pound line backers.
They have to be protected. They need to be better informed. They need cool headed education from day one.
Not according to the Republicans.
I'm not a bible student. Maybe there's nothing in the bible about protecting the welfare of children.
Sarah Palin is a nightmare.
One of her decisions as mayor was to have the police charge rape victims for their rape kit examination . . . . She's strongly, vigorously on record demanding that rape victims who might sadly become pregnant be forced to carry the child to term . . . Clearly sexual predators are not inhuman monsters in her eyes.
People are actually still claiming that the "liberal media" are being unfair to her and McCain. What liberal media?
McCain lies all over the place and it should be ignored? And not ignoring it means you're a liberal?
McCain's incessant lying and rewriting of history being accepted as fact scares me. Its that old childish thing, "tell a lie three times and people will think its true." Its been proven effective for the Republicans since Nixon. Why change?
It does bother me that at his age McCain might not be able to tell what is the truth anymore. It would explain his stream of contradictory answers to things. Each moment he may be living in a different truth, like most of us.
Not being ageist just trying to understand how a man who purports himself to be a good man can be so many things that I typify as being a bad man.
Sarah Palin though: she's a pure monster. An ugly vile contemptible monster. Forgetting her bounty on wolves ($150 a leg . . .) Her vindictiveness and her Nazi like attempt to ban books, BOOKS! What is most vile is her attempt to suppress religious freedom.

Click images for desktop size: "Horrifique 2" by Unknown I do consider attempts to "cure" homosexuals and Jews as vile and an attempt to suppress religious freedom.
Its not that I find her religion so bizarre. All religions look bizarre to outsiders. The Catholic church with its ritualistic cannibalism would terrify an alien. It preaches against graven images but fills its churches with statues and graven images . . .
I'm sure that my own personal religion formed from years of Catholic catechism, zen learned from TV, movies, comic books and rock & roll seem freaky and other worldly to anybody outside of myself but that's cool. Its what I believe and I have a right to it.
It works for me and it doesn't interfere with you believing whatever you believe in.
When a religion preaches that you have to give them money or you're not allowed to believe or that it preaches intolerance of another's beliefs it stops being a religion to me. It becomes something ugly that is only an excuse to hate.
Palin, when she's not slurring dogs is slurring people and slurring those people's rights to believe what they chose to believe. She has argued that her faith is the true faith and that others are wrong! She argues so fervently that it seems clear that she will not allow me to believe what I chose, nor will she allow you to have your own personal religion.
She calls herself a "hockey mom". Which, I guess, is some bastardization of soccer mom. I always thought of soccer mom as a pretty pejorative term. It implies a woman who has no interest in sports but doesn't mind schlepping her kids around because she gets to socialize with other pampered upper middle class and upper class women where they can sit around and kvetch about their husband's career. It also implies a woman who's world of experience is so shut down that they can't envision another world.
I never viewed it as a compliment. I don't know of any women who embrace the term, until now. In fact I know many woman who resent being called soccer moms. They think its degrading.
It looks like the Republicans are going to steal the country from us and win the election. The rest of the world is amused or terrified. Unfortunately its our enemies who are amused and are friends and the neutral nations that are terrified.

Yesterday Apple released iTunes 8.
This is the worst piece of software Apple has ever released. It is draconian in the same way Microsoft is draconian. It is evil.
I'm not even talking about the way it begs for my complicity in sharing all my personal tastes and personality with them.
About 5 or 6 years ago, back in the days when OSX was called Jaguar, I think, Apple released an update that killed your internet connection! Not just mine but everyone who updated! I had to go to the public library and get the fix.
As ugly as that was most Apple users viewed it with wry amusement. We believed that Apple and its users were a team. This was just a mistake. We forgave and understood.
Then the iPod took off.
iTunes 8 is a cynical marketing ploy. Its contemptible.
One of the things I like about OSX is that its attractive, easy on the eyes, easy to work and concentrate without being overwhelmed with brutally ugly widgets and canvases.
iTunes 8 has decided that trying to trick me into impulse purchases is more important than me having my computer look the way I want it to look.
They've disabled some pretty basic functions. Some for no reason I can think of, some to turn iTunes into an advertising piece of spam.

Click images for desktop size: "The Cabinet Of Dr Caligari" Its unacceptable. By hacking around in the app I could get it looking presentable but then discovered that it renames all of my files and there is NO WAY to stop it. It does this for its convenience, not for mine. No way to keep my files named the way I want them named . . . how draconian. How Microsoft.
When this computer dies I will most likely get a much cheaper than Mac pc and run Ubuntu.
Apple is bending towards WalMart's ways and running the computers to the benefit of money and the iPhone. I bought the computer to work for me, not for them.
Oh, and there is no easy way to uninstall iTunes 8 and go back to iTunes 7. I know how to do it but I wonder if its worth the effort.
Nothing works better in iTunes 8. The only reason for the update was the Genius (!?!) bar and to add all the spam stuff.

With all my carping you might not believe it but I had a good day yesterday.
I took my ebike to my appointment with the High School head coach. That was pleasant and fun.
The interview was less so. Nothing wrong with it but I have some questions that I never got the clear cut concise answers I wanted.
I'm being understanding. As usual I'm trying to be careful and not be too understanding. I'm trying not to let my eagerness cloud my judgement.
My phone just buzzed to tell me that I had to recharge the battery. In that moment I was totally rushed thinking it was "the call".

Click images for desktop size: "African Desert" by Unknown The main problem is that the school can't afford to hire pure football coaches. They have teachers who've volunteered for unpaid overtime . . . I've been there before.
Teachers have a different perspective on the kids then a coach does. They should. They have different responsibilities and, while they do share some common goals they also have different goals. My concern is that the overwhelming goal be to the benefit of the kids.
Now I just get to wait for my phone to recharge then I'm biking to the store to get a couple can's of dog food!
Life is good and interesting even if the outside world isn't.

Posted by David at 11:12 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Click images for desktop size: "Flying Lemons" by Unknown I was sick yesterday. Not bad sick, just excess body fluid expunging sick. Some kind of flu I'd guess.
My friend put in a 14 hour day at work. She didn't get home until after 1 a.m. That might be a good thing. There was no one for me to take out my crabbiness on. Especially since she was near as sick as me.
The cat is surviving my haphazard health care. She bit me again while I was "treating" her. She's healing well, clearly. We are starting to settle back into our casual calm antipathy.
I did manage to watch a modestly interesting film, "Prey For Rock & Roll".
It started out interesting, at least. Its about a mid 30's woman who's been playing in bands for the last 20 years. Clinging to the dream of being a rock star.
This bit of the story was told with a voice over narrative. She talked a lot about things that bothered all of us who were still standing in front of a drunk crowd while we were considering whether it was worth it to buy medical insurance.
The movie had some good lines, "In twenty years I'd had more bands than I'd had lovers"; "It was a good gig. We made thirteen fifty apiece. That's not enough to support my eyeliner habit."
The fact that 3/4 of the femme band is gay was okay. It made it interesting to hear some of the same fears all gigging bands have come from the heart of a woman.
I liked the band stuff: The leader supporting
Click images for desktop size: "Untitled" by de herself with a tattoo parlour, the lead guitarist giving guitar lessons to thrashing chicks. That was good stuff that was to easy to relate to. The friction between boyfriends and girlfriends, the friction and joy within the band was all presented well and it was scary identifiable real. I liked the meetings in coffee shops with promoters.
I didn't even mind the stuff about dealing with the families. I even liked the older woman trying to cope with her lesbian heavily tattooed daughter who was nothing like the dream she had when she gave birth to the little girl. She wanted a housekeeper not a rock goddess.
But then it got stupid. It introduced too many melodramatic moments and just frittered away the story of the band. I mean the jerk off boyfriend (of the one straight member in the band) turning into a sexual predator with serious hang ups was hard to take for the wrong reasons. (The actor being really poor didn't help that bad idea much either) But then they added in this extraneous character and sub plot about incest and murder, the movie just got stupid. I watched a lot of it in fast forward while my interest disintegrated.
I liked the idea of a band in LA. One thing that's true is Hollywood sucks in the young beauty contest winners and now it sucks in the people with rock star dreams. There seems to be enough to hold a movie together. For the first 40 minutes it was making a pretty cool feature but the filmmakers either got scared or they ran out of ideas and turning it into a movie about vulnerable women was boring stuff and wasted a great start.
Like most people I get the most disappointed when you promise me greatness then deliver me to drivel.

Today I'm going to work on a flier for the dog walking thing.
I liked meeting the new little dog. I figure a flier with a phone number would feel more real to people and maybe assuage some of the worries that I'm a house breaker or some such.
I also need to find out the local laws about posting fliers on lamp posts and things. I'd like to hit like every light post, at least one every fifty yards or so. But I don't want to get fined or something.
I'll also hit all the animal hospitals and pet stores (thanks for the suggestions)>
And I'll take the dogs for a longish walk. I still feel a bit ill. On the upswing but still thick around the middle sort of thing.
It doesn't sound busy but it will be.

I'm getting a lot of requests, again, abut where do I get this or that picture.
I've answered this before. Some people send them to me. They make them. I trade sometimes and sometimes I just stumble across them. A very very few I make myself. A lot are art scans I turn
Click images for desktop size: "Wolverine" by Marvel Comics into desktops (wallpapers for you Windows guys).
I used to not use stuff that had no artist info but I soon found out a lot of that info was wrong anyway. But I seldom remember where I got anything that has a generic name or an unknown attached to it. If it says anonymous that means the person who sent it to me doesn't want their name floating around. I respect that.
I got some interesting "new" music this weekend. I hope I get to hear some of it today.

Posted by David at 10:56 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Click images for desktop size: "Vienna" by Unknown Got to work yesterday.
Made fifteen bucks by hauling 15 refrigerators up 2 and 3 flights of stairs in a renovated apartment building.
There was another guy helping. The boss paid us in advance!
My immediate thought was to look over at my partner to see if he'd skip out on me and leave me with all the hauling. He didn't but I think he was considering it. I think that if I'd said I'd go along with it he'd have rabbited.
It was pretty easy work. Took us about 3 hours. It really should have taken about 90 minutes tops. I thought about some guys in Texas I'd worked with. They'd have finished the job in about 30 minutes and then we'd have been off looking for another job.
Nice not to be quite that desperate.
A neighbor woman, older than me, if you can believe such an ancient person exists - older than me indeed, was out mowing her lawn. My instinct was to offer to do the job for a few bucks. She's nice to the dogs so I offered to help her for free. I admit I was glad she turned me down. All the walking and hauling had left me pretty shattered. My ham strings are unbelievably tight.
The rain is pouring down here. No chance to amble and look today. Then there's a weekend so its staying in and suffering the modern way, with beau coup movies and music to divert and amuse.
I'm out of pills, out of sugar free sweetener. I still can't drink coffee without sweetener. I'm a wimp like that.
I still miss my little blind dog.
The rain bought him fresh to the fore front of my mind. The thunder terrified him. When it thundered he'd get as close to me as possible. During bad thunder rolls he'd dig his head into my arm pit if I was lying down, or jump into my lap if I was sitting.
Seems creepy missing somebody like this. Missing them being terrified, I mean. It seems cruel.

I still don't want an iPhone. I'm mildly interested in an iPod touch, which is just an iPhone without the phone. The only impact the iPhone has on me is that Apple updated the AppleTV firm ware to work with the iPhone. The update included some nicer looking icons.

Posted by David at 9:24 AM | Permalink

Click images for desktop size: "Love With A Gun" by Unknown Went out and found some work today.
Not much. Looked for about 3 hours. Worked for about 2 and a half hours. Made twelve bucks.
There were times when twelve bucks looked tiny. Other times when twelve bucks looked even bigger than this. These dollars look only slightly larger than human sized.
I got 7 bucks for one job helping an older guy clear stuff out of his yard and stack it by the curb. Found it in the first 1 hour. Worked for about 45 minutes. He paid me with all the change he had in his pocket - seven dollars. I thought it was fair.
Then I walked around for a bit, let the sweat dry on my body. Finally got on at an apartment complex with the landscaping crew. Worked for about 2 hours, raking, blowing (with one of those heavy gas powered things strapped to my back) and picking up the garbage.
I didn't mind the work. It was tedious so I let my mind go other places.
I came crashing back to reality when the Foreman gave me five bucks . . . I told him I thought he made a mistake, that I'd been working for over 2 hours. He then told me where'd they'd be tomorrow if I wanted to show up . . . Then he just turned his back on me and walked away.
My options were to either look ridiculous, chase after him and slug him. This probably would not have gone well. He had about 2 inches and 40 pounds on me, even if 30 of those pounds were fat.
Or I could get my pack, sling it over my shoulder and walk away, cursing him under my breath and vowing he'd never steal another Tuesday from me. Which is sort of what I did.
With the economy going the way it is there might be a day coming too soon when that five bucks looks bigger than it is.
Walking home I thought about how America has been destroyed by the guys who scream loudly that they're trying to save our country. Someone once said never to trust a man who wear his patriotism like a flag.
All that group appears to have done is fatten
Click images for desktop size: "Crow Dancer" by Unknown themselves on our backs and create a country that has seen the rich get richer and evolve into a tighter and smaller group. Right now they say that 10% of the people in this country have 90% of the wealth.
I remember when these stats were used to explain banana republics and to explain and criticize the poverty and turmoil of a starving peoples.
RoboCop was the first film where it was calmly stated and accepted that Corporations are evil and that they're going to stay that way.
Recently I was stunned to discover that Roger Ailes is the head of the incendiary news department of Fox TV.
Now ignoring the fact that FOX is owned by a Briton who got an astonishingly fast American citizenship so he could own American TV networks and newspapers . . . and send the money out of the country. . . A citizenship that might have gone to someone who actually wanted to live here and be American, who might contribute to society instead of taking from it.
I met Roger Ailes a few times decades ago. Back then he was personal management for some actors I knew.
The last time I met him was at a Hollywood party. The discussion there was how he was quitting show biz. Not really, he was media consulting for Republican Party candidates.
As he espoused their values we couldn't help noticing that all of his new political candidates were extreme right wing and all pretty well established losers. A couple of his former clients noted that he espoused his new clients credentials and suitability for the job in the same tones of fervor he used when pitching one of his clients for a Cheeto's commercial.
I noticed weeks later that all of his clients lost their elections. Ailes must have been good though. Next time I read about him he was handling Presidential campaigns.
Now he's heading a TV news department. He's managed to combine show biz and politics. Pretty nifty. I have no concept or clue as to his sincerity. I mean selling Cheeto's and selling the way we're going to live our lives isn't that big a difference in my mind.
And he's even richer and I'm begging for dollar bills.
By the standards of America 21st Century that means Ailes has been right and I've been wrong.
I miss the days when the bad guys played the same way they do now. With evil, no scruples and a sick joy in the pain and damage they inflict as they ignore the rules and plot endlessly for their own selfish goals. I liked that because a good guy would come along and kick their butts. He wasn't handcuffed by the rules, he relished them and believed that "Right made Might!"
Now there's no more heroes. We all play by the same lack of rules and I don't like it.

Click images for desktop size: "Mahouse Comics" by MC Publications I don't like it near as much as when the lines actually existed and good and bad weren't dependent on the wind of the day.

I got the mp3 leeching problem sorted, I think. Please let me know if anyone has problems.

My friend went to the doctor yesterday. Nothing happened. New doctor who did nothing but talk - not tests or . . . so she has to go back.
No one likes going to the doctor, especially for a second visit that has to accomplish the same thing that the first was intended to.
I know about that.
The important thing is that I was measured at 5' 11 and 1/2 inches. She was 5' 4 and 1/2 inches.
This means I win the all important height war by a handy margin. Even though I wonder where I lost that 1/2 inch I always used to have with me . . .

Posted by David at 3:28 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

Click images for desktop size: "Book Cover" by JW McGinnis One of those days where all I feel is the waiting.
Life in stasis.
Of course the waiting is for money.
I know a whole lot of guys who'll insist the only things worth waiting for are women and money, and generally in that order.
From that the general supposition is that you need money for the women . . . or vice versa. Not sure. I am sure that time and education has taught us that's not really true.
Waiting for my tax refund. Got it in my head that the tiny pice of money will solve some issues, relieve some stress.
I have a friend who has a retirement plan. He buys a lottery ticket every week. Always picks the same set of numbers and one quick pick. I never thought much of his plan but at least it was a plan.
I have noticed that people are different with money. I think its might even be a genetic thing. Maybe there's a capitalistic gene.
You give some people five hundred bucks and in a month they'll turn that into a thousand, in two months four thousand. Then there are guys who'll get five hundred and pay off some bills and save a third. Then there are guys who get themselves a new toy. We all have friends who'll use the money to pay off some bills and then feel so good about that they'll go off and buy a gift for the girl friend or wife and get themselves a new toy and end up a g-ball in the hole.
Money.
Not required to be the root of all evil but sure as the full moon doesn't give a damn about your broken heart when you look at most of the superficial problems we all have it always seems the root is money.
School lunches and designer shoes. Money.


Click images for desktop size: "Untitled" by Edmund DuLac My friends who jobs I was stressing about yesterday seem to have had better times of it.
I'm all for that. I'm all for people having a better time with their stress than I have.
For my friend with the job bad review one of her superiors stepped forward and told the bigger boss that the comments attributed to her were false.
In a court of law that one statement would be enough to get the whole kaboodle tossed out. When the crux of one statement is found to be made of whole cloth lies the courts will bounce the whole package as unreliable. Or maybe that's the old days way of handling it. Justice has always been transitory. Look, the Senate just made it justice for the FBI and ATT&T to spy on you, listen to your phone calls and read your email. Six years ago that would have been injustice.
Don't know much about how corporations handle things like this. I'd guess they'll do whatever till save them money and keep the unions out of their shops.
At least the fear of unions, the fear of having to treat your family of employees fairly and equitably is enough for that at least. (Corporations get like snippy men - They claim they want to treat people fairly they just don't want to be forced into it . . . that's why they use threats and intimidations and lies to keep unions out of their shops . . . )
At least it looks like she'll be as alright as you can be working in a corporation. They still haven't fixed the health insurance issue.
My other friend ended up working completely left alone yesterday. She worked about twelve hours and discovered she likes her job. The hell comes from other people. No surprise there. Even Sartre realized that correctly.
Sartre just left out the part about money.

Posted by David at 9:40 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Click images for desktop size: "Santa's Workshop - Christmas Card 2005" And suddenly everything is beginning to look alright.
Its not quite "Twas The Night Before Christmas" but its getting there and it feels enough like it to not matter.
And isn't that a part, a small part, of Christmas? That the grief and hatred and rage of the world can be overwhelmed?
My friend got her dream job.
Her pay cut will be more than I grossed last year . . . but its still her dream job. Doing something you believe in, using your skills to achieve a dream you've had, a dream that's just not in her world but in all of ours.
Its the sort of dream that I wanted my kids to strive for. And she got it.
Rah.

The new host is turning out to be pretty impressive. I'm not sure if that's because the old host was disintegrating so badly that I've lost perspective or if Blue Host is really that good.
At dot5 the mysql server was dying so every time you did something that touched it the database would just corrupt all the more. Trust me; a busted database is something you just do not want.
They helped me fix it. I never expected that.
I still can't run Movable Type 4.1 beta. And you know how it gnaws at me to not be running all the alpha and beta software that I can . . .
It will get fixed and I'll have it sorted out soon enough. Yup.
Its that kind of day.
Everything seems possible.
Its coming up Christmas.

Click images for desktop size: "Napping By The Fire - Christmas Card 2004" There are parts of myself I don't like.
I am conceited so that might surprise you.
Parts of me I don't like!
But its so.
During this mini-crisis I was afraid of it.
I'd figure some of you have seen it.
I'm not every in touch with my human side (lets not even waster time talking about feminine side!).
It manifests itself when things get bad. I start to lock down and prepare to do nothing else except endure.
I disconnect from physical and emotional sensations. I go off of pure intellect and rage.
Its my survival mode.
It doesn't make it pleasant to be around me.
I'm into the mode so it doesn't impact me much at all except for hating the lack of feelings, while thinking this is the only way to make it through.
Through all of this recent spate I've noticed that I didn't fall into that mode automatically. For me that's a big step; not just waking up and being in that monstrous mode.
And then I never really fell into it. Yeah, I had to fight it some, but not enough to want a cashiers check for.
I think its my puppy. She has demands and some needs. She keeps me sane.
I think its my friends. They need caring for to struggle on too.
Its probably a combination of all of these things and a lot of things I don't even know exist.

The Pittsburgh - St Louis game is on TV. I picked the Steelers although I wouldn't be surprised to see the Rams beat them.

Posted by David at 9:02 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

If you're reading this it means that you're at the new hosting site and your name servers have migrated!
I was looking at the old traffic meter I kept and it's apparent that the old host had been dying for months and months.
Here everything just feels zippy!
I'm glad you found us again . . .
Today was just a day of waiting. Me: I waited for the old Registrar to release the domain name. My friend had a bit more difficult time. She was waiting for her dream job to call.
No real reason to expect them to, except that each of her references would call her after they spoke to her dream job and they indicated they would probably make a job offer today.
No phone call.
She (and I for that matter) would be disappointed but would accept not hearing from them. I still stir up a lot of anger towards her jerk ex-employers. I have nothing but bad feelings towards them and it codifies all the bad I had felt about them previously only in a more grotesque gargantuan form.
There's still tomorrow.

It was warmer today, which was justification to not finish all the snow shovelling . . . it justified it to me anyway.
My back is feeling about 90% right now but my right shoulder is cramping up.
We went for a walk, the blind puppy, my puppy and I. They rejoiced in the warmer weather and the sight of kids having snow ball fights and sliding around in the slush.
It felt like Christmas was really almost here.

Posted by David at 7:13 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Click images for desktop size: "Christmas Card 2005" by Unknown It's colder than I'm used to. I can only think of a few times when I've ever been colder.
THose times I was places where it was foolish to expect it to be anything but freezing.
Maybe that's the way it is here too.
A while ago I came back from Europe and went to Texas. Too complicated to explain why Texas. It was he place I thought I had to be.
One of the reasons I was glad to be returning to America was that I had seen the rights of people, of workers and children stomped on. It was a disgrace.
I never figured that the European Employers had either decided to follow the American lead or if the US Government had decided that people were no longer as important as corporations. Workers not as necessary as stock holders . . .
By trusting in people and trusting in the law I got myself into the worst hell of my life.
Where do you go when they tell you that you're right but no money comes in the window while the landlord pounds on the door?
Its sad because my friend is in the same situation. A wrongful termination by a failing company. They owe her money but they're not going to pay so that they can save themselves her "golden parachute", which wasn't all that golden.
And the strength of it is that they are going to make her go the whole ten yards and sue them. The logic is simple: They'll either settle before judgement or they'll be out of business.
Nice guys. Businessmen.
There's no escaping them.
Bastards.
Merry Xmas.
Tomorrow my puppy goes for her level 2 Obedience certificate. She needs 6 points from her Down Stay.
She doesn't like to lie down. I realized that she never has and I got her to do it for her Therapy dog training by making it a game. Its compounded now because she views the down command as another word for PLAYTIME!
Its my fault . . . the children always pay for the sins of the father.

Click images for desktop size: "Christmas Card 2006" by Unknown Its not terribly important that she pass or get a certificate. Its only important for her self esteem . . . ??? Okay, I'd be proud if she got the Certificate because it comes with a red ribbon she can beat up!

And now . . . THE NFL!
No matter how many water heaters or appliances die around me that no one can afford to replace I always keep my priorities straight.

Last week I was 14-2, which sounds pretty good but actually dumped me all the way down to 2,393rd place! With 3 weeks to go it is daunting, but I'll have fun anyway. Strangely I'm not mathematically eliminated . . .
As usual my picks are in Bold.

Denver at Houston - I picked Houston as there defense has been coming on stronger and stronger while their running game has reached its peak, which os good - not great. The Bears proved last year that a good defense and good running game can take you places. Denver is falling apart. They should win one or maybe two games but they're done this year.

Cincinnati at San Francisco - The Bengals are a much better team than their record shows. If they had a line backer survive the first month of the season or anything resembling a defense they'd be contenders. The 49er's remain suspect. But, as I write this they trail the Bengals by 3, 10-7! So who knows. Nah. They'll lose. Frank Gore is not good enough to carry this team.

Arizona at New Orleans - Two teams playing out the string when all they really want to do is go home and dream of next year. I give the nod to the Saints because Drew Brees is playing for more than a contract. He's got a chip on his shoulder and the talent to make doubters pay.

Atlanta at Tampa Bay - What else bad could happen to the Falcons. I feel for them and know what they're going through. Not enough to pick them but . . . other teams have had sudden coaching teams and come out and played inspired football . . . just not often against a decent team that is trying to lock down a play off spot. It would be beautiful if it happened though. Just beautiful.

Click images for desktop size: "Christmas Card 2004" by Unknown
Baltimore at Miami - I'm telling you the Dolphins are the most feared team in football right now. No one wants to be the guys they beat. The Dolphins are even bringing in the 35th Anniversary team - the perfect team - to help rally them. Still, the Ravens have been snake bit the last two weeks. They should get better here. And if the Dolphins lose and the Patriots win (they should) history will be made next week when a 14-0 team meets an 0-14 team. The universe needs that sort of balance.

Buffalo at Cleveland - The Game Of The Week by far! I'm taking The Browns because of home field advantage, mostly. But its a game on the cusp, I think. And I'll get it on TV . . . which is something good.

Green Bay at St Louis - The Rams aren't as bad as their record but the Packers and Favre have the look of a team wanting to make history. I want them to make history!

Jacksonville at Pittsburgh - I'm surprised the Steelers are so heavily favored here. I guess the logic is home field advantage and their recent 1-3 spat will send them on the field angry. My instincts are that the Jaguars could make this a rout but will get dizzy and let the Steelers keep it close. My runner-up game of the week. I won't get this on TV . . .

New York Jets at New England - I see football as sport and art. There's not much difference to me between ballet and a wide receiver, between a boxer and a down line man, between a back and an opera star. Except nobody belittles you if you say you don't like football. The Patriots are looking like magic. Billichik has the whole Spy-Gate fiasco to fire up his team. Pity the Jets.

Seattle at Carolina - The Seahawks are working hard to make people believe they belong in the play offs. The Panthers don't have enough talent to convince them other wise.

Tennessee at Kansas City - I almost feel sorry for the Chiefs. If Vince Young would stop worrying about stats and just play his game this could be a rout. Their defense is better with Haynesworth even at 50% and their running game is a wonderful thing. The Chiefs are just looking to avoid the off season cull,

Indianapolis at Oakland - Since the Raiders have already conceded the game when they guaranteed time for rookie Jackson at QB how could anyone pick them. Peyton Manning has a rep as a great guy but do you notice the blood in his eye at game time?

Detroit at San Diego - I feel sorry for the Lions. They worked so hard all season and especially last week. I hope they all get a chance to return as a team and try again next year, avoiding the pot holes. The Chargers are a disappointment, especially Philip Rivers and even Tomlinson has not looked good. Without Shawn Merriman as creaky defense got worse but they should still have enough to squeak by the disappointed Lions.

Philadelphia at Dallas - Boring game of the week. There's no magic left in the Eagles. They may get crazy and shock the Cowboys but not in Dallas.


Click images for desktop size: "Nell McAndrew" Chicago at Minnesota - The Bears are going with Kyle Orton . . . Adrian Peterson is healthy. I'm looking forward to the Vikings making the playoffs. Aside from the Cowboys and Packers the pool is so weak they could get deep into it.

Washington at New York Giants - This is my cruddy game of the week. Both teams confuse and confound me but not in any pleasant way. Neither of them are playing good football. I'm taking the Giants because they always seem to play just well enough to save Tom Coughlin's job.

As usual using these picks for any reason than to admire my insanity is just plain silly!

Posted by David at 9:29 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Click images for desktop size: "Eternity Comics" a common theme lately seems to be hectoring me about not keeping this log regularly updated.
I'm not sure why.
I'd hope its to see the pretty pictures.
For some I guess it's to be able to check in and see that I'm okay, maybe to see what sort of whacky adventures my puppy and I have gotten into today.
Other than that I'm at a loss.

I have been busy. Very busy this whole week.
Busy always seems to result in me being dead tired.
Last Wednesday I had to go to the State Legislature and talk about dogs. Sadly to talk about humane ways of killing dogs. As if there is any humane way for anything to die.
It went over well but not in my eyes or ears. No one was converted, I'm fairly sure. Rhetoric that doesn't effect change is sinful to me.
State employees want to round dogs up and execute them quick and easy. They use the machine invented by the Nazi's for Auschwitz and Triblenka. I can understand without empathizing with their situation. They want their job to be easy. It doesn't matter to them whether dogs and cats expire with dignity or wrapped in fear, confusion and fighting each other as well as death.
Thinking about that made me think that I hope Michael Vick is guilty of the things he's been indicted for. If he isn't guilty its a real crime the way he's been pilloried.
I'm not religious but I think that all creatures deserve respect, to live a life of their choosing. To grow and live free.
I don't think Vick, the State or dog pound employees have a right to choose harsh brutal methods of killing living things.
If I hear the phrase, "They only kill the ones who aren't adoptable," again, I might have to decide the speaker is un-adoptable. I figure if they have the right to decide life and death then they give me the same right.

I've been mad trying to get all the paperwork and logistics ready for my move.
Its a pleasant if arduous chore.
Its time. There are people I'll miss, of course, but a brighter future lies ahead.
I'm worried how my puppy will cope with it. She adores me and I hope that is enough for her to endure all she'll have to go through.
I know she'll try.
Today she passed her final exam. She's now certified to work with mentally retarded patients. It takes a load more forbearance, tolerance and empathy as well as old fashioned patience.
I figure living with me for 2 years has taught her that. She always understands and trusts me. Even now when she's on a diet, she stays an overweight ball of love.

Too many of the people I work with are getting dogs. I keep wondering what hole they're trying to fill in their lives. Most seem to want a dog to entertain them. They don't share their lives they just expect the dog to be a perfect house guest and not a loved member of the home.
Out of four dogs 3 have been returned to the shelter . . . one because, in four hours, it was claimed the dog did nothing but attack him. Smart dog.
Of course this idiot got another dog right away.

Click images for desktop size: "Untitled" by Frank Frazetta I'm not just being harsh. This fellow is an absolute idiot. He frightens me because he's the sort of guy who I think is truly un-adoptable.
I met him at lunch. He weighs 325. I know as that's how he introduced himself and as, "I'm Brian Junior and that stands for BJ and that stands for Blow job and I loves 'em. I weigh 325. My ex-wife is a maniac (sic) depressive who used to beat the hell out of me. I left school after the 7th grade. Look at me! Who says you need an education."
Hell of a way to meet someone. Since this was in a crowded restaurant and he felt the need to shout at the top of his voice so that all heads turned towards him I spent the rest of the hour trying to make sure he didn't breathe on me because I was already certain that if he touched me I'd have to slug him.
He spent the rest of the time telling everyone how much smarter he was than all of us. We work hourly paid jobs so I'm confused as to what he considers success.
He's back with his wife who actually outweighs him. His wife moving in with him is what prompted the decision to get a dog.
Poor dog.
I saw two films of note.
One Japanese, "Memories Of Matsuka". Its the story of a an obese bag lady who is murdered in a park. A young guitarist in a punk band is visited by his father who orders him to clean out the hovel she's been living in. The kid is surprised to learn he had an aunt.
While cleaning out the refuse and squalor he begins to get glimpses of what his aunt was. Se was a child jealous of her father's attention to her terminally ill sister.
Matsuka goes off and become a teacher, then a modern geisha, a topless dancer, a yakuza's moll, a singer, a prostitute and finally a murder victim. Her life is told in bright super saturated colors. The story amazes and delights, confuses and confounds. Its remarkable and all the more so in that Matsuka isn't all that extraordinary. The people she met were all just people. The glamour she knew is that a cell mate from her time in prison turns out to be a wildly successful porn star. In other words Matsuka's life isn't any much different than any of ours.

The other was South Korean, "Miracle On First Street". Its about the mad rush in Korea to industrialize, to compete with Japan and the USA. To do this a lot of nasty things are done to rather nice people. A gangster is sent in to terrorize the people of a slum to move out so that his boss can build a fancy high rise.

Click images for desktop size: "Butterfly" by OCLE The gangster isn't too good at this. He meets the kids and is inadvertently turned into their protector. He meets a girl who aspires to be a championship boxer, like her brain damaged father. And with just that the film progresses easily into being a great comedic, tragic miracle. Their are three miracles. The first is supernatural and just a red herring to set you up for the true miracle of First street. And like all miracles it is merely human.
The third miracle is this little movie.
Only other thing of passing interest is the people who come to see me at work. The priest who tells me of his fears about his marriage and his first son, and the psychiatrist who I first new as a resident talking with me about his concerns in his life before him.
Students talking about trips and plans, men and woman talking to me about the ashes in thier arts and how badly they've handled a bad relationship.
I have no idea why they talk to me about it. I used to think they just talked to anyone who would listen, but now I'm not so sure.

Technorati Tags: dogs, films, football, movies, work

Posted by David at 4:00 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Click images for desktop size: "Scarey Nightmare" by Donna Lorelei I felt pretty good yesterday.
It was my day off. Hence no work and none of that insipid drama.
At the doctor's I realized that the pain had abated.
Not gone but just calmed down to the point where I hadn't even thought of taking pain killers for the past 3 days!
It's still there, like a sprained ankle that you can walk on but you're always aware of. That's okay, even if i does flow through my whole body.
That thought buoyed me through the rest of the exam. Everything is holding steady. And that's good.
I took the rest of the news in better cheer. They want me to stop working - which is great except they don't offer to pay my bills or feed the puppies.
Its not so much that they object to me working, they don't want me to have contact with people. People are germy things, I guess. Maybe that's why I find them so attractive. They want me to go into a plastic bubble sort of environment..
That's not worth considering. Its not so much that people will kill me. Not mere contact anyway, so much as people will always make me sick like this. I can't fight off infection, its not like HIV, its that all infections will step up my white cell count and decrease the red cell count, which means pain, fatigue and general creepy feelingness.
That's not so bad. People are worth that . . . most people anyway.
I just have to tell those guys who like to come around me and spit constantly to knock it off. I find it disgusting anyway. Not so much the spitting but it seems there are some guys, usually the ones who like to tell me jokes from the "Blue Collar Show" who think that clearing their throats and spitting every 90 seconds (yeah, I've timed it) is cool.
If you have the flu or a cold I get to bop you one!
It can be dealt with.
Then my puppy has started to feel better. She apparently had an irritated colon. They're not sure what caused it but the speculation is that she was stressing because I've been so unwell. Who built empathy into the canine mind?!?
Our vet gave me FREE advice. I was thinking we'd done something to offend her and she didn't want us to come into the office . . . yeah, I've been sick . . . she was just saving us money.
Her free cure is working!
the dumb puppy never acted sick, she was always happy and telling me jokes but she was panting heavily, drooling and had diarrhea for 6 days. Poor thing, and she still kept telling me jokes and bringing me coffee . . . she does tell me jokes anyway . . . dog jokes . . . they are not very subtle . . .
Finally I got to go to the Animal Shelter and visit the puppy we "rescued".
It angers me that her life before was so bad that this is the first time I have seen her unafraid and very happy. She was so much better I couldn't hold on to any anger on her behalf.

I was feeling so good I agreed to be a special consulting coach for the pee-wee football team.
I think that means I get all of the fun and none of the stress. One thing about pee-wee football is that too many parents and adults don't understand that I've got nil interest in winning those games. I'm more thrilled having the kids tell me how a play worked. I seldom can understand exactly what they're saying - usually they forget to take out their mouth pieces when they're talking to me. But I certainly understand the joy in their faces and the thrill of succeeding.
That's the biggest victory you can have.

Works getting worse. I don't even like thinking about it. Too much nonsense. For an unsupervised job where I get paid by the hour they demand too much, they take too much and they give too little.

Posted by David at 8:00 PM | Permalink

Click images for desktop size: "Safe" Major League Baseball I've been a bit . . . unwell.
Saw the doctors today on an emergency visit. Its a good news/bad news thing.
The good news is that I don't have to take that horrible oral chemo till they sort it all out.
The bad news is that my white blood cell count is too high and red cells too low - which explains a lot about how I've been feeling.
The worst part is just the general malaise and fatigue. There's freaky pain but its just pain and nowhere near as bad as the pain of losing a friend.

I lost a friend today.
Eddie Robinson passed away. He was 88. He coached football.
He wasn't like what most people would consider a friend. I met him once when he spoke at a conference for coaches.
I was coaching in England then. Had just started. I loved the kids but there were odd things - just as an example. I was the HC but before every game I had to mark out the field, set up the end zone and all the field markers. Then after the games I had to break all down and put it all away.
Nothing wrong with doing that but it felt weird.
I cornered Coach Robinson and talked about it. He told me about when he started at Grambling he had to do the same thing.
He got to the point where he looked forward to it and when Grambling Football got big enough to support a full time grounds crew he sometimes even missed it.
I remembered that. I always remember it too the first time some players showed up early just so they could help me get the field ready for game day. My team were considered socially excluded, which is fancy talk for being bums and hoodlums. It meant a lot on that day - I remember thinking that the sun cut through the early morning haze a bit quicker that day.
I never saw them that way but the rest of the UK did. The hardest part was making sure they didn't see themselves that way.
I talked to Coach Robinson a few times about it. I've talked to a lot of football coaches in my time and one thing he and I never discussed were X's and O's.
We never discussed the mechanics of playing the game on the field. He always talked about getting the players prepared to step on that field and more importantly about the time when they would step off the field forever.
Coach Robinson won a lot of football games. He's still number 1, 2 or 3 all time. (I'm not sure where Bobby Bowden or Coach Paterno fit in on the list). He sent a heck of a lot of players to the NFL. He was proud of them but I think he was prouder of the players who left the game and opened their own businesses and raised families.
The few times we talked it was always about how to use this sport of ours to get these young men ready to win in the important game out there in the world.
That's what I'll miss the most, that there is one less man on this planet who thinks that more important than dollars, more important than fame, is the importance of being proud of yourself, of loving your community, of loving your family. That more important was how much love you could give, not how much you could take.
The coaches most important job was to instill those qualities in the players who came to you and to teach them that those qualities won on and off the field.
Eddie Robinson was a great coach and a great man.

Click images for desktop size: "Satin Ends" by Blatte There's a lot more that's been going on.
My little foster puppy Noelle is on her 1 week trial for her new forever home. I hope it works out. I was surprised to discover that some people think that they are getting to try out the puppy for a week, and some think the puppy gets to try out the new parents. I think its just enough time to see if they fit and can become a family.
I have a new puppy to share the place with my puppy. She's older and a bit scared right now. She just came an hour ago.
She'll be fine.

I got a raise at work! Fifteen months after my last raise. I got 3% which would be okay if I were making 60K plus.
I get paid by the hour so the raise is less than $500 per year . . . or about less than half the going rate of inflation.
I merited this raise because I increased net profits by 18%.
What is shocking is that they'll be shocked when I quit.

Technorati Tags: coaching, dogs, football, puppy, work

Posted by David at 6:29 PM | Permalink

Click images for desktop size: "Untitled" by Chris Achilleos A lot going on but all of that minor stuff that just says we're alive.
One thing I'm pretty good about is not dwelling on things that are out of my control.
I'm not much for fretting. Or for thinking things through, in some opinions.

Its been a slightly hectic time again.
Took my puppy to the dog park. It was a rather large group I'd thrown together. There was an equally large group of people already there.
My puppy is becoming a dog. She fretted. She didn't play, not even with the dogs she knew.
She didn't like me being around other people. She ignored all the dogs but fully checked out every person of the human type who was there. After she'd sniffed them all she stayed stuck to my side. If anyone walked too near me she interposed herself between them and I.
She wasn't aggressive but she was having no fun. Her whole mission in life was to not let anyone get to near to me. I don't know what she thought would happen.
The only time she relaxed was when we went far off by ourselves. Then she'd take a treat and try and tell me a bad dog joke or two.
I have no idea where she got the idea that I had to be protected. Might be just a part of the breed.
Problem is, my problem, is I want her just to have fun.
When I was able to take her into work with me everyday she got past the fear of me being around other people. She was attentive but she quickly got over the stress. Now being at home most days she worries.
Silly girl.

I saw the 300 on TV. I think the story of the Spartans' Battle of Thermopylae is the most stirring in history. I think of it often in times of crisis and always remember that it took only one man to believe in himself to change the entire course of history.
Oddly the Rudolph Mate' 60's version, "The 300 Spartans" was more accurate historically . . . 300 keeps a nice feel to the battles and keep the fighting more in line with the Spartan style. The biggest problem with 300 is that the guys all looked like fighters but it was pretty obvious they couldn't fight!
The clocked down swooshy photography became monotonous for me. It did a good job of hiding the lack of skill but the end result let me wishing Liu Li Chian was directing this.
I felt some bursts of anger at someone retelling a story I love - the adultery scene was baffling and added nothing. With all the the fol der rol they never attempted to lay any background to the Spartan culture - "they beat people up a lot" clearly sufficed. (As the directors previous film was the "Dawn Of The Dead" re-make he's proving again he has no respect for the average film goer.)

My coworker had another heart attack. She's in the hospital where my puppy is a therapy dog.
Sadly she is blaming the heart attack on the boss that I also find stressful. I feel they are blowing it by making wild proclamations.
She;s had two attacks in as many weeks. But she is over weight, has high blood pressure and a cholesterol count around 300!
I just think by making wild assertions it makes the very legitimate complaints they have easy to ignore. At best it confuses the issue, making it difficult to sort out and address.
While even I can admire the melodrama of, "Her management technique nearly killed me!" that doesn't root out the deeper problems in a micro-manager, or dealing with being the victim of a micro-manager.
I also admire we came up with the term of micro-management in lieu of saying inept.

Click images for desktop size: "Fish In A Toucan Mask" by JC Christensenl
The foster puppy is doing better. Little Noelle is nearly ready to be seen by the world! On Sunday we'll take her to an adoption event so she can make her debut. I expect her to be nervous around people especially the way people will all try and rush up and pet her head.
I'm tempted to take my puppy along but she's the sort who'd try and charge people for petting her . . .

There was a lost dog. Found him.

Lots of conversations with customers about the inane hypocrisy of our government when it comes t the war in Iraq. I mean all the bumper "magnets" supporting our troops but demanding tax cuts to the point that the young men who return with shattered bodies and minds have to share their sick beds with rats and filth.

Posted by David at 5:10 PM | Permalink